


from the bottom of my heart (still i'm falling in love)

by haengbokhaeya (shinybicho)



Series: like a beast [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mob, Fluff and Angst, How Do I Tag, M/M, soonyoung gives him heart attacks, the angst is jihoon being emotionally constipated, tsundere!Jihoon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2017-04-15
Packaged: 2018-07-25 07:43:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7524307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinybicho/pseuds/haengbokhaeya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lee Jihoon was prepared for anything, being in the mob and all. Except for Kwon Soonyoung. (Stupid, fucking, idiotic Kwon Soonyoung.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> this is a prequel to _kiss, kiss (fall in...)_ which means you can read this without spoilers for that. you can also read that first before you read this, or this before that. i'm pretty sure it's not going to make a difference. it's a stand-alone, but in the same universe.
> 
> i like writing flustered!jihoon and very-much-in-love!soonyoung, so here it is.
> 
> title from _fly to the sky_ 's sea of love.

Jihoon was used to waking up in a god forsaken hour of the day because they needed to go on rounds. They had to check their stores, their territory, making sure that no one was messing in it, messing with the family.

What he never got used to, however, was waking up to Soonyoung’s face a few centimeters close to his.

Over the years (yes, years), he learned to control his reaction, his feelings waking up to a narrow-eyed, too _fucking close_ face holding a smile. After a few tries, he learned not scream once he opened his eyes. He sighed instead, blaming the redness of his cheeks on the heat because Soonyoung was _too fucking close_. (That was one thing he never quite learned to control, unfortunately.)

“Up and at ‘em, Ji!” Soonyoung said, as he ran a hand down Jihoon’s face. Jihoon scrunched his face and turned, his back facing Soonyoung. He pulled the blanket over his head and curled underneath it. It was too early to deal with Soonyoung, damn it.

“Ji, we gotta go do the rounds. Cheol-hyung and Junhui need to accompany Mingyu.”

“ _Again_?” Jihoon grumbled, his voice muffled through the blankets and rough for using it the first time that morning.

Soonyoung pulled the blanket off of Jihoon, who couldn’t grip it tight enough in time. Jihoon scrunched his eyes tighter and curled into himself further. “Go away!”

“Nope, sorry, can’t do that, Ji.” Jihoon shivered when Soonyoung’s breath tickled his ear. Fuck Soonyoung for not knowing the meaning of personal space.

A hand ran through his hair, half petting and half combing. Jihoon released a soft sigh in satisfaction because that felt damn good. He felt soft lips press quickly against his cheek and his eyes snap open. Jihoon shot up, one hand holding the kissed cheek. He turned his body to face Soonyoung. His eyes were wide, staring at Soonyoung like he just grew another head.

Soonyoung smiled softly, and shrugged.

“I told you to stop doing that,” Jihoon said, rubbing his eyes. There was no use going back to sleep, not when his heart was beating too noisily, and too rapidly. He scooted forward to the edge of the bed, feet trying to reach the floor. Soonyoung didn’t move. Just smiled at him, looked at him as if he was the most endearing thing in the world.

Jihoon stopped himself from biting his lower lip, because that would mean being affected by Kwon Soonyoung. Lee Jihoon cannot be affected by Kwon Soonyoung. No matter how attractive and in love his face looked.

So Jihoon placed his hand flat on Soonyoung’s forehead and pushed. Soonyoung toppled over the edge of the bed with a loud sounding crash. Jihoon refused to look at or help him, even as he stepped over Soonyoung. Soonyoung groaned, holding the back of his head and turning over to curl in himself. He reached out for Jihoon, but only heard the door closing with a slam.

Breathing out a defeated laugh, he turned onto his back again and placed his reaching hand on his forehead instead. He closed his eyes, and counted slowly to ten. He opened his eyes, inhaled again, then sat up. With new determination, Soonyoung stood up and walked out of Jihoon’s bedroom.

He walked into a particularly normal scene. Junhui and Seungcheol placed plates, chopsticks and spoons on everyone’s seats, passing around each other fluidly when reaching for the pitcher of water or the bowl of soup. Jeonghan sat in the living room, watching television with Mingyu’s head on his lap. Jihoon, as always, was nowhere to be found.

Soonyoung turned to Seungcheol who caught his gaze. Seungcheol nodded his head, pointing his chin to the bathroom door across the room. He turned around and saw Mingyu and Jeonghan’s arms raised, a finger pointing at the door. Soonyoung tucked his chin, but smiled shyly at how the rest of the family could read him so well.

Undeterred, Soonyoung made his way to the door and knocked in a very annoying beat.

“Jihoonie, time for breakfast!” He cooed, ignoring the way Jeonghan and Mingyu suddenly made their way to the dining room.

Soonyoung knocked again, repeatedly calling Jihoon’s name through the door. “Alright already, I’ll get out in a minute! For the love of--” Sending a triumphant smile, Soonyoung walked back to the dining room. He happily sat down on an empty chair left for the two of them.

Jihoon emerged from the bathroom, hair still damp and a towel around his shoulders. His skin was pink due to the hot water and steam. He froze a few steps closer to the table when he noticed that the only chair left available was the chair between the wall and Soonyoung.

“C’mon, Ji,” Seungcheol said, obviously struggling not to smile. Jihoon glared, ignoring the empty chair and made way to Mingyu who sat in-between Jeonghan and Seungcheol. Mingyu looked up at him with noodles hanging from his mouth.

“Come on, Jihoon,” Seungcheol said again, a little more serious but still having an underlying teasing tone to it.

“Mingyu’s already eating. Please just sit down on the empty chair.” Jeonghan piped up, handing a bowl to Soonyoung.

“We have to leave in a while,” Junhui continued when Jihoon did not move. “And I really think you shouldn’t treat Mingyu like that just because he’s the youngest. We were assigned to protect him, after all.”

Jihoon pouted unknowingly because he was second youngest among all of them, and Mingyu was the heir to one of the strongest mafia families in Seoul. If anything, he was the most powerless one.

“I’ll eat later.” Jihoon said curtly. He began to walk back to his room when a hand grabbed his wrist and pulled him to sit on the open chair. He blinked, his body stiff and eyes wide at the change of viewpoint. He looked at the hand on his wrist and followed the length of the arm. It took him a few seconds to register that it was connected to Soonyoung.

“Eat.” Soonyoung said, and Jihoon felt a number of emotions that he didn’t understand. “We’re going on patrol.” The tone was short, curt, very rarely used by Soonyoung. Jihoon frowned down at his wrist with Soonyoung’s hand still holding it. When Jihoon looked at the others around the table, they were all eating as if neither he nor Soonyoung existed.

Growling, Jihoon yanked his wrist back but turned his body to face the table. The smell wafted to his nose and his stomach clenched in hunger. He grabbed his chopsticks and began stuffing his face.

He refused to acknowledge Soonyoung’s knowing smile. They all ate in silence, the only noise coming from the television Jeonghan left turned on. At the corner of his eye, Jihoon noticed Soonyoung smiling at him while eating. The moment he actually turned his head a fraction, he caught Soonyoung’s gaze and coughed.

The sauce flowed up his nose, the noodles going down the wrong way. He turned to the wall to avoid coughing in front of Junhui and the food. He wheezed, pounded his chest, coughed, and reached for a glass of water. Luckily, it was handed to him. He drank while coughing once, twice, before he calmed down long enough to swallow. Soonyoung held his wrist again, the one holding the empty glass. He pulled it to him, stretching Jihoon’s arm, and filled it again with water. Slowly, he pushed the hand Jihoon was using to hold the glass back to him.

Soonyoung turned back to the table, placing the pitcher between them carefully, before he continued eating, as if nothing happened at all. Jihoon’s face was red from the incident, he told himself as he drank the glass of water practically filled to the brim, cupping the glass with two hands instead.

His face was red because of the incident, he told himself again, resolutely ignoring the warm, comforting, and slightly damp hand rubbing circles on his back. Not because it was Soonyoung’s.

Abso- _fucking_ -lutely. Not.


	2. Two

It was a bust.

Alright, so Jihoon thought he could feel more thankful since they didn’t have to face anyone who were abusing shops in their territory, but walking around to not do anything wasn’t how Jihoon wanted to spend the day.

“Wanna get something to eat?” Soonyoung nudged his shoulder as they walked down the streets again. It was pretty peaceful, though it was a little bit after one in the afternoon. Most of the places were getting ready for after-work customers, mostly people who wanted to have a good time. Others, like the old lady selling fresh food near the end of the street, smiled and greeted them. She insisted they come in for a free taste, and Soonyoung wasn’t about to turn down free food. But it did cause him to get hungrier.

Jihoon was proud to be part of the mafia. More specifically, to be part of the Kim Group. They were only called mafia because of the amount of men, money and power the current leader, Mingyu’s father, held. They owned the entire line of property he and Soonyoung were walking on. The group rarely dabbed on drug dealing, preferring to do things over the table. Tenants were also quite thankful. The group rarely demanded quick payments, even lessening installment percentages. They also made sure that each shop was satisfied and well protected (hence the constant patrolling).

(Once he was asked, Mingyu said that it was because his father didn’t particularly need money. He didn’t like gambling because of the smoking and the drinking atmosphere that came with it. He loved, and was absolutely terrified of, his wife to do so. They also had tons of investments in various companies, so it wasn’t as if they would run out of money if they didn’t demand for rent payments.)

Soonyoung grabbed Jihoon’s wrist and pulled him inside a quaint eatery. The ahjumma that ran the place always cooed whenever Soonyoung came, flashing a bright smile. It started when Soonyoung was on patrol with Junhui. They both ended up coming home late because Soonyoung had insisted on helping the ahjumma with her groceries. Ever since then, Soonyoung was a particular favorite.

“Soonyoungie-ah!” The ahjumma replied, after Soonyoung shouted out a greeting.

“Ah-jumma!” Soonyoung cooed, voice pitch quite high. He jumped in front of the ahjumma who was already preparing their food. Jihoon sat at the far end of the eatery. The buzz of the electric fan at the distance, as he watched Soonyoung smiling and chatting with the ahjumma. She seemed to adore Soonyoung. Even when Soonyoung stopped talking to stare at the food she was mixing, she had a gentle smile like a proud mother. She placed two bowls of tteokbokki that nearly overflowed with the amount she gave. She shooed Soonyoung away as he giggled in excitement, loudly thanking her for giving them an extra amount.

Jihoon turned to look out the window, realizing as Soonyoung approached, that he was watching Soonyoung the entire time. There was a pink flush on his cheeks that he chose to ignore. Soonyoung tilted his head, questioning. He slid the tray carefully on the table, trying not to topple any of the soup. Jihoon ignored Soonyoung’s silent question and instead, yelled loudly.

“I’ll eat well!” Jihoon snatched the spoon and chopsticks from the tray, slurping the ramyeon noodles noisily, then taking a bite of a tteokbokki piece. Soonyoung raised his brows as Jihoon stuffed the food into his mouth. Wordlessly, Soonyoung poured water in a cup and placed it where Jihoon could see it. He smiled when Jihoon drank from it after a small cough.

Shaking his head, Soonyoung smiled as he held his chopsticks and ate his own bowl of tteokbokki.

They ate in relative silence, save for the slurping and hissing from the spiciness. Soonyoung took a little longer to finish his own bowl. He enjoyed watching Jihoon eating, and there was a pink tinge on his cheeks from the spiciness. Jihoon was too adorable for words.

When Soonyoung focused on eating from his bowl, Jihoon stopped eating and watched Soonyoung too. Soonyoung kept his head low, shoving noodles into his mouth to hide a knowing smile lest he give into the temptation to kiss Jihoon in front of the ahjumma.

So he hid, pretending that he doesn’t know that Jihoon was watching him eat as well. Knowing Jihoon, blood will be spilt and he just wanted to enjoy the day with him.

“Yaaah,” the ahjumma commented, as she arrived at their table with another pitcher of water. She cooed at them both, patting Jihoon’s hair as he wiped his mouth with a tissue paper, before ruffling Soonyoung’s hair, making it stick out in all directions. Soonyoung pouted, but the ahjumma tapped his cheek in pure affection. “So how was the food?”

“You know how it tastes, ahjumma!” Soonyoung teased, earning a playful but irritated pinch on his cheeks. Soonyoung tapped the table in surrender. Jihoon snorted, turned away from them to hide the laughter bubbling up his throat.

“I was talking to this lovely, cute boy of yours.” The ahjumma released her hold on Soonyoung's cheeks to smile at Jihoon. “You've never brought him here before.”

Jihoon paused, sobering from Soonyoung's predicament, the ahjumma's words sinking in. He wasn't the first or the only one Soonyoung brought. Of course he wasn't. What was he thinking! (He completely missed the ahjumma's knowing look at Soonyoung, who smiled at Jihoon.)

“Junhui's busy,” Soonyoung said coolly. “I'll make sure to bring Jihoonie more often instead.”

“Make sure that you do. The child needs to eat more.” A hand grabbed Jihoon’s jaw, surprising him as he was forced to look at the ahjumma. She smiled down at him, all soft and motherly that he couldn't help but blush. She released her hold, tapping his cheek similarly to Soonyoung before leaving to tend to a newly arrived customer.

“Are you done?” Soonyoung asked, smiling at Jihoon. On the other hand, Jihoon watched the ahjumma talking to the customers while plating their orders. He gave a small, proud smile.

(He missed Soonyoung’s surprised face. Soonyoung chuckled quietly, shaking his head before his smile widened. He knew his face looked weird, but the feelings of love was just too much for him to bear.)

Soonyoung stood, pushing his chair back as his other hand reached for his wallet. He went to the counter and pulled a few bills. The ahjumma turned to him, her smile brightening at the sight of him. He gave her the bills, and she swatted his hand. She waved the ladle with a hand on her hip and a worried frown. Soonyoung’s hand reached to rub at his nape. They said a few words that Jihoon didn’t hear from where he was, but the ahjumma waved Soonyoung away, turning around to tend to other orders.

Jihoon jumped in surprise when Soonyoung turned to him, smiling. He nodded out the door, exiting the quaint eatery. Jihoon scrambled to follow, slightly stumbling on his way out.

As he exited, Soonyoung stood near the wall, clearly waiting for Jihoon. His arms were stretched above him, his black blazer and tucked-in white button up riding up from his pants. He bent from side to side, his body flexible from doing martial arts. Jihoon’s eyes widened at the action. Soonyoung exhaled after his stretch, that was when he saw Jihoon. A smirk appeared on his face as he invaded Jihoon’s personal space again. Jihoon instinctively moved back, his eyes crossing as Soonyoung’s nose was nearly touching his. Their height difference made Jihoon feel smaller, though Soonyoung’s hands were in his pockets.

The peck on his forehead was more surprising, as he opened his eyes he didn’t know were closed, and he exhaled a breath he didn’t know he held. Soonyoung skipped backwards, a triumphant smile gracing his lips. There was no blush on his cheeks and Jihoon hated him for it. Jihoon glared at Soonyoung after getting over the shock, one hand holding his forehead where it still burned. Soonyoung cocked an eyebrow, the triumphant smile turning into a smirk.

Jihoon turned and began walking to the other direction. Soonyoung shook his head in amusement, running after him. He held Jihoon’s wrist, forcing Jihoon to slow down. Jihoon tried to yank his arm away while he was walking, but Soonyoung had always been stronger. Slowly, the fingers on his wrist slid down to his hand, and fingers slipped through fingers. While Soonyoung’s fingers closed, Jihoon kept his dangling.

“Yah,” Jihoon said in a warning tone. They continued to walk, only stopping in front of the pedestrian stoplight. Soonyoung turned to him, the smile not having left his features yet. He raised the hand he was holding, turning the back of Jihoon’s palm to his lips and placing a small kiss.

“Yah!” Jihoon screamed, tugging his hand harder, but to no avail. Soonyoung laughed heartedly, joyfully, and the light turned green. He took a step down to cross, pulling Jihoon with him. The strength of his grip forced Jihoon to follow. He could barely feel his hand anymore, but it was the heat on his cheeks that made him feel dizzy. (It was beginning to be an irritable trend, Jihoon noticed.)

It was the heat on his cheeks from eating the spicy ramyeon tteokbokki, and not the comforting heat of Soonyoung’s hand holding his.


	3. Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm still hungover from shining diamonds in manila and all the moments kept on crashing back. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN i'm just sad china line couldn't come. THEY'RE VERY TALL AND VERY GOOD LOOKING UP CLOSE AND IT'S PRACTICALLY NO DIFFERENT FROM THE PICTURES AND THEY WERE SHINING SO MUCH I'M JUST-- okay i'm done. SO MUCH SOONHOON HAPPENED SO HERE HAVE A CHAPTER. really, i'm done this time. lmao
> 
> ps. i think we're starting to get somewhere in this chapter and i think it can end in 10 chapters or less. haven't planned it out completely, but it might not surpass 10 chapters. jfyi ♥  
> pps. i've also noticed that i need to switch from soonyoung to jihoon's pov and vice versa so i hope it's not confusing!

“When are you gonna give in and just admit your feelings to Soonyoung?” Seungcheol asked, out of the blue when it was just them in the dojo. Other than the narrowing of his eyes, Jihoon’s face was as blank as it could get.

“I don’t have feelings for Soonyoung.”

Seungcheol nodded, making a sound of affirmation. They slowly walked in a circle, studying their opponent’s movements. “That’s why you only ask Junhui or me to train you,” Seungcheol teased, smirking. “Right?”

Jihoon charged, grappling the lapels of Seungcheol’s uniform. He tried to turn him over, but Seungcheol was able to counter his attack by fitting his hands between Jihoon’s arms and pushing out.

“I ask Junhui to train me in wushu,” Jihoon gritted through his teeth, jumping back a few before charging again. Seungcheol allowed him to get closer, forcibly pushing Jihoon’s kicking away from his stomach. “I ask you to train me in taekwondo. I don’t see any reason to ask Soonyoung to do the same.”

Seungcheol twisted his heels onto the mattress, securing his balance before he took Jihoon by the belt. He lifted Jihoon easily, slamming him onto the mattress with a loud thud. Jihoon grunted, turning to his side when Seungcheol released his hold.

“We’re not even _doing_ taekwondo,” Seungcheol said in a know-it-all kind of tone. “And you know he tells you he loves you pretty much every five minutes in a day.”

Jihoon laid still on his stomach on top of the mattress. His arms were stretched in front of him as he refused to look or even dignify Seungcheol with an answer. He knew. He _fucking_ knew that Soonyoung would tell him that he loved him every five goddamn minutes, every goddamn day. It was always followed with a kiss somewhere around his face, even.

“Doesn’t he even get embarrassed doing that?” Jihoon asked, turning to his back while Seungcheol sat down beside him. He sat cross-legged, facing the mirror. His hands were behind him as he leaned back. The room was quiet, save for the muffled sound of Mingyu playing whatever game he hadn’t broken into pieces yet. Occasionally, there was a whine that suspiciously sounded like “Stop cheating, hyung!”

“It’s Soonyoung,” Seungcheol answered after a few moments. As if that answered every question Jihoon had. “You’d be lucky to have him.”

Seungcheol stood, reaching for his toes to stretch and begin cooling down. Jihoon groaned, eyes closed tightly and his hands covering his face. “I _know_.”

And wasn’t that the most ironic thing.

 

* * *

 

“He’s not here.” Jeonghan said casually, flipping the channel to another replay of a music show. He tucked his hair behind his ear, before finally settling for a rerun of a romantic comedy drama.

Jihoon flinched and froze on his spot. He just returned from taking a shower after the training with Seungcheol, and he warily checked if Soonyoung was there. Jeonghan was perceptive though (it came with the career, unfortunately). Relief and guilt crawled up his throat. Jihoon cleared his throat and made his way to the refrigerator to get a glass of water. The towel he used for his shower hung around his shoulders to keep the water droplets falling off his hair.

He grabbed the glass that was on the dish rack, absentmindedly opened the fridge and pouring himself water. He drank it in three gulps, closing the fridge door while he did. Jihoon exhaled, a soft ‘aah’ sound once he finished drinking. He took a step towards the sink to clean the glass, but something caught his eye.

_Jihoonie-ah! Drink lots of water after your training with Cheol-hyung, okay?_

It was a small sticky note with a weird character drawing that suspiciously had a 10-hour-10-minute shaped slits for eyes. Its hands were stretched out, a simple triangular drawing without the bottom since it was meant for arms. Its lips was a wide upside down triangle in a form of a wide smile. On one of the hands, there was a drawing of a flag with small lettering that said _Ji, hwaiting!_ complete with a heart.

The words that followed the reminder on the note made Jihoon flush.

_I love you! ♥ - SY_

(It also had a character drawing, only this time it was just the head. Its face still had 10-hour-10-minute shaped slits for eyes, but the mouth was formed into a backwards ‘3’, followed by hearts surrounding it.)

Jihoon cleared his throat again, looking everywhere but at the note stuck on the fridge.

“Aish,” he hissed, scratching the back of his hair, the water dripping everywhere. He yanked the fridge door open again and poured himself another glass of water. He drank it faster. Before he knew it, the fridge door was still opened, and he had finished the large bottle of water.

He slammed the glass onto the counter beside the sink, breathing heavily from constantly drinking. The snicker from the living room broke his glaring contest with the wall, as Jeonghan approached him.

Jeonghan closed the fridge door, smiling at Jihoon like he found him both pitiful and endearing.

“Where are they?” Jihoon said quickly, avoiding any mention of the sticky note and suggestive comments about the now-empty bottle of water.

“Jun’s out grocery shopping.” Jeonghan said. He took the bottle of water and positioned it near the trash bin. He opened a cabinet and pulled another large bottle of water and placed it inside the fridge to replace the empty one. “Mingyu went to a family meeting.”

There was a pause and a smug smile on Jeonghan’s lips. Jihoon glared darkly, silently thankful he wasn’t holding the bottle anymore else he would have crunched it in half. The glass was cold and wet to his touch.

“Seungcheol followed after Jun. You know how heavy our groceries get.” Jeonghan’s lips twitched and it was all Jihoon could do to not attack him.

(Jihoon may sometimes be feared for his temper, but Jeonghan was a force to be reckoned with, since he had the access to all the guns in the house.)

Jeonghan stopped and began to return to the living room. He passed by the fridge door and smiled widely at the sticky note, before throwing another suggestive smile at Jihoon.

Jihoon broke. “Fine! Where is Soonyoung?”

Jeonghan returned and ruffled Jihoon’s hair. Jihoon’s face was a mix of a pout and anger, not that Jeonghan could tell the difference. (It was always a pout, much to Jihoon’s dismay.) He stopped messing with Jihoon’s hair before he said, “Soonyoung’s with Mingyu at the family meeting.” And he sauntered away.

Jihoon’s face was flushed, pink to the tip of his ears as he kept his head down from Jeonghan’s continuous ruffling. When Jeonghan said Soonyoung was with Mingyu, Jihoon felt his shoulders relax and suddenly…

Suddenly, he needed to go back to the bathroom.

Jeonghan’s wide smile and silence was loud in Jihoon’s ears.

 

* * *

 

“Finally!” Soonyoung yelled, leaving the door open for Mingyu. He dropped to the sofa and slid down. There was ruffling of plastic at his side. When he turned to look at them, Seungcheol, Junhui and Jeonghan were taking the groceries out. Mingyu sat on the other end of the sofa, Soonyoung only feeling a small rise from his weight.

“Tough meeting?” Seungcheol asked, not looking up from the plastic bag. His hands moved automatically, taking and placing the meat onto the table. Jeonghan took the stacks and kept them in the freezer drawer. Junhui walked to and fro from the counters to keep the dry groceries such as the sesame oil bottles, the gukganjang bottles, the doenjang and the gochujang. The packets of gochugaru and seaweed were kept in a box inside the pantry.

“Same old, same old,” Soonyoung replied distractedly. Mingyu, on the other hand, fell asleep on the couch. He smiled, remembering that they had to get up early for the meeting.

Family meetings in the Kim Group were mostly updates on property, business (that was over the table), and territorial boundaries. It was technical and business-like. Soonyoung hated going to the meetings, but when needed, he went.

Mingyu’s territory within the Kim Group was the long market with bars, cafes, and quaint restaurants near their place. Mingyu’s father asked Soonyoung to come since Soonyoung actually frequented the place.

“Ahjumma’s place has been getting annoying attention recently, though,” Soonyoung continued, remembering the note one of the members of Mingyu’s father’s group said. It was the ahjumma he and Junhui frequented to, and the one he brought Jihoon to recently. She was a nice lady with a handful of staff that could be counted on one hand. By all means, her restaurant deserved all the attention it received unless it was the annoying type.

Seungcheol and Junhui’s eyes narrowed at Soonyoung’s statement. The annoying type of attention, within the Kim Group, was a code for ‘someone was trying to get tough on their territory.’ The ahjumma of the restaurant was tough (which Soonyoung found endearing, hence acting spoiled and all that), but she wasn’t like them.

Mingyu snorted mid-snore, and the atmosphere broke. Soonyoung blinked around the living room and the connected kitchen and dining room. He frowned. “Where’s Jihoonie?”

Jeonghan chuckled. “He’s been in his room all afternoon after his training with Seungcheol.”

Soonyoung walked to them, and stood while Jeonghan finished packing the plastic bags. Seungcheol and Junhui passed Soonyoung to flop down onto the couch themselves. When Jeonghan finished folding the plastic bags, he knocked onto the fridge door. Walking closer, Soonyoung noticed that something was missing.

The letter he wrote and drew on for Jihoon wasn’t sticking there anymore.

Jeonghan cleared his throat to catch Soonyoung’s attention next, and when Soonyoung turned his head, Jeonghan pointed at the empty bottle of water near the trash bin. Soonyoung’s face brightened with a wide smile, his eyes curving along with his lips. He knew that there was a bottled water practically still full when he left that morning. He never knew that seeing an empty water bottle would make him feel so proud.

After smiling at the water bottle, Soonyoung dashed to Jihoon’s room. Jeonghan left to get extra blankets because Seungcheol and Junhui followed Mingyu into dreamland.

Knocking softly, Soonyoung twisted the knob of Jihoon’s door. Slowly and as silently as he could, Soonyoung opened it. His heart burst at the sight.

Jihoon’s room was a clean one, with white walls and properly placed and folded clothes in the closet. There was one bed at the far end of the wall once you opened the door, and another bed adjacent it. It was Jihoon and Mingyu’s room. (Long story short, Jihoon chose the first room and everyone just played rock-paper-scissors after. Mingyu lost.)

On the bed in front of the door, Jihoon curled onto his side. The arm he was lying on stretched down, while another curved near his face. His palm was open beside the bed as if he was guarding something from falling.

Soonyoung walked closer, tip-toeing his way closer to Jihoon after he closed the door. He kneeled onto the bed, and Soonyoung swore his heart bursted again.

Jihoon’s mouth was slightly open, silent snores echoed inside the room. His cheeks were pink, and his hair was messy. There was a towel laid out behind him, and Soonyoung figured that he fell asleep while waiting for his hair to get dry again (seriously, why didn’t he just use a hair dryer?).

But what caught Soonyoung’s eye the most was his note.

His note was between Jihoon’s pillow and his open palm. Jihoon’s soft breathes hit it lightly. It was dry and crumple free, like it was just taken from the fridge door and stuck onto his bed. Soonyoung smiled down at Jihoon, his hand moving by itself to comb through Jihoon’s hair. (He was right, rolling his eyes fondly, when his fingers caught itself in some knots.)

Jihoon scrunched his eyes and groaned suddenly, causing Soonyoung to still his hand. His heart beat loudly in his chest, not because of fear of Jihoon waking up, no. Jihoon buried his head further into the pillow, nuzzling it, before Soonyoung resumed combing his hand through Jihoon’s hair.

Soonyoung smiled. Soft, proud, endearing. He leaned closer to Jihoon’s face. His hand moved lightly from Jihoon’s hair down to cup his cheek. Soonyoung’s thumb caressed Jihoon’s cheek, and Jihoon released a sigh. Jihoon’s opened hand moved closer to the note, but didn’t crumple it.

Soonyoung pushed Jihoon’s fringe away from his face with the same hand that was caressing his face, and kissed his forehead.

After a few seconds, Soonyoung pulled back and whispered with a smile, continuing with his caresses. “I love you, Ji.”


	4. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so first, sorry it took so long. i've been in a rut, and i've been panicking about my entrance exam. but things are doing better. :)
> 
> second, sorry if i haven't replied to your comments. i read each and every one, bless you all. 8u8 thank you so much!
> 
> third, i've always wanted to post this chapter ever since i've started writing the integral part of it. i'm so happy i finally get to post it! it's also, by far, the longest i've written and posted. IT WAS A BIT DIFFICULT TO CONNECT THE BEGINNING TO THE END.
> 
> fourth, WHO'S READY FOR THE COMEBACK? NOT ME. (BLESS SVT'S STYLISTS FOR THE TEASERS BECAUSE JIHOON WITH CURLY HAIR AND GLASSES, AND SOONYOUNG WITH DARK HAIR AND GLASSES.)
> 
> lastly, BELATED #happywooziday! (and #happydongwooday, and #silverlightday)
> 
> SO HERE, HAVE ALMOST 5K WORTH OF WORDS THAT’S ABOUT 20% ANGST, AND 20% COMEDY, WITH 10% ROMANCE, PLUS 5% CHEESINESS, AND 45% FAIL FROM ME.

Jihoon woke up because his stomach started clenching in pain. Loudly, he grumbled along with his stomach as he rubbed it. The smell and noise of fried eggs entered his room and his stomach only grumbled louder.

He sat up, his hand pushing all his weight up, and he felt a sharp corner cutting his palm.

Hissing, he looked down beside his pillow and saw the note again. His eyes softened as he took it and read it again. Another wave of flush crawled up his cheeks and Jihoon cursed under his breath. Nope. Still not going to let Kwon Soonyoung affect him, damn it.

How long was he asleep for, anyway?

Jihoon walked out the door, absent-mindedly checking the time from his phone.

“You slept through the night.” Jeonghan said from where he was watching over Mingyu’s shoulder. Jihoon sat on the set table for three. His eyes roamed the room, his lips turning in a frown.

“They’ve been called in. There’s been some annoying attention in the territory lately.” Jeonghan stepped aside to allow Mingyu to reach for the plate. “So they were called out to check those places.” He shrugged, walking to the table with Mingyu behind him, with plates filled with eggs and toast.

Jihoon nodded, sliding into one of the chairs, the one beside the wall. Mingyu placed the plates in the middle of the table before taking a seat himself. Jeonghan took the seat beside him with an eyebrow raised at Jihoon.

“You okay, hyung?” Mingyu asked, passing the plate of eggs to Jeonghan without looking at Jihoon. It took Jihoon a while to process the question. When it did, he shook his head and reached for the toast and jam that was already on the table. Languidly, he stroked the bread knife to and fro on his toast, spreading the jam all over. His eyes were unfocused, and he looked deep in thought. He hasn’t seen Soonyoung in almost twelve hours…

Mingyu and Jeonghan looked at Jihoon, then at each other before turning back to Jihoon. Jeonghan’s lip twitched at the corner. Mingyu pursed his lips, biting it lightly to stop himself from smiling. He silently thanked Jeonghan who gave him back the plate of eggs.

Jeonghan cleared his throat. “Jihoon, please pass the jam.”

Wordlessly, Jihoon passed the jam without looking at Jeonghan. His eyes were staring at the table, although Jeonghan doubted he was actually seeing anything.

“Jihoon,” Jeonghan began, as he spread his jam on his own bread. “Are you training Mingyu today?” He opened his mouth wide to take a bite after spreading his jam, but Jihoon didn’t respond. His mouth was barely even moving. Just slow motions of his jaw, as if chewing was a completely boring chore.

Mingyu watched Jihoon in awe, and amusement. It was a rare sight to see Jihoon that way, since it’s been _years_ since Soonyoung tried winning his affections. Mingyu smiled at the thought. It was nice to see Jihoon finally coming to terms… somehow.

Jeonghan took a huge, loud bite of his bread. The crunching of the toast causing Jihoon to blink, and realize that the bread in his mouth was starting to feel disgusting inside his mouth. He chewed faster, before finally swallowing.

“You back with us, Jihoon?” Jeonghan teased, taking another loud bite of his toast.

“What?” Jihoon asked, one brow raised at Jeonghan, as if he wasn’t caught in a trance at all.

Jeonghan internally shook his head. God, only Soonyoung could get into the kid’s mind. “Are you training Mingyu, or will I?”

Jihoon swallowed another bite, and glanced at Mingyu. Mingyu knew that look. He was assessing, planning his training, and the amount of work he had to do. “I can train him until noon. Then I have to go through some paperwork for the family.”

Jeonghan nodded in acknowledgement, taking another bite of his toast, and drinking the orange juice that was prepared. (Mingyu was no longer allowed to drink milk in Jihoon’s presence, the giant.)

“I think,” Jeonghan said, after drinking his juice, “Cheol mentioned them returning a bit after lunch, so maybe you can get updated with what’s happening. I’m sure Soonyoung’ll be able to tell you.”

Jihoon glared darkly at Jeonghan, who took it to stride. There was a wide smile plastered on his face. He knew there wasn’t anything he could do to Jeonghan that wouldn’t bite him back later. So he turned his glare back to the toast and crunched on it.

“Well then,” Jeonghan said, as he drank the rest of his juice. He stood up, stacking the plates he used on top of the other. “Since you’ve been asleep the entire night, and Mingyu and I did breakfast, you’re on cleaning duty. We’ll be at the dojo, warming up for you.” Jeonghan winked, and placed the dishes onto the sink.

Mingyu scrambled to follow, after seeing Jihoon’s eyes narrow further. He knew Jihoon wouldn’t be doing anything, but it was safer than sorry, especially since he’d be the first trainer of the day. Mingyu quickly ate the rest of his toast, and eggs. He pounded on his chest, as he drank the rest of his own glass of orange juice. Jeonghan chuckled at the poor sight, and he rubbed soothingly on Mingyu’s back.

Finally calming down, Mingyu loaded his own dishes on top of Jeonghan’s, and waved. His mouth was still full with toast, and juice. Jihoon scrunched his face in disgust, but waved them away as well.

Now that he was finally awake, aware, and alone again, he felt oddly empty. He hadn’t seen Soonyoung in over twelve hours, and it was weird. There hadn’t been a call, or a voice mail. For as long as he could remember, it was the longest he’s gone through without hearing Soonyoung’s voice.

Now that Jeonghan wasn’t there, Jihoon allowed the blush to crawl to his cheeks. _Absence makes the heart grow fonder_ , he could just hear Jeonghan’s teasing voice. He raised his glass of juice onto his lips, and tilted up. But he puckered his lips in a pout, childishly. (He was alone anyway, he was allowed to sulk.)

After finishing the last drop of his juice, he stood up and went to the sink. He reached for the apron on the side, and began tossing the crumbs on the plates into their waste basket. Mindlessly, he washed the dishes, even the frying pans.

It shouldn’t have been a little over thirty minutes to get everything washed, dried, and cleaned. Once he was satisfied, he washed his hands again, wiping his wet hands onto the hand towel, and hung his apron before meeting with Mingyu and Jeonghan at the dojo. He changed, and washed his face, before reaching for the keys and locking the door.

When he arrived at the dojo, Mingyu and Jeonghan were on their knees, facing each other. From the way their stomachs grew at an inhale, and shrunk at an exhale, they were meditating. It was a good way to get attuned to their surroundings, so it was always the first thing they do with Mingyu, regardless of the trainer. (So far, it’s been a moot point since Mingyu’s still clumsy as hell, hitting and bumping into walls, and people, left and right.)

Jihoon moved as quietly as he could, removing his shoes. Once he took a step onto the mat, Jeonghan’s eyes opened. His body stiffened, but immediately relaxed when he realized who it could be. (It was a pretty friendly neighborhood, and they were a pretty peaceful group, but Jihoon knew that with the name, and power, came the enemies. Although there’s some part of him that can’t help but think that it was also due to Jeonghan’s… past.)

Jeonghan shuffled, getting the feeling back into his legs, but Jihoon raised a hand and shook his head. He needed Jeonghan to stay, anyway.

Their surroundings were silent, save for the occasional rustle of the trees, and the whistle of the birds. It was the perfect place to meditate. Jihoon sat between Mingyu and Jeonghan. He saw Mingyu’s brows subtly moving. A small twitch of a muscle. Meditation wasn’t exactly Mingyu’s best subject, but it honed a lot of skill sets.

Jihoon paused, waiting to time his own breathing with Mingyu and Jeonghan’s. They had been training Mingyu for a couple of years now. It was during these times when Jihoon needed to test if what they taught him were kept.

If it was, then Mingyu should have figured out that someone else was already in the room besides him and Jeonghan. It was subtle, fleeting, but Jihoon breathed differently. It could have caused a disturbance to the surroundings. Jeonghan kept silent, watching Mingyu and Jihoon for the smallest movements. His eyes were sharp, his muscles relaxed.

In a second, Jihoon moved. His hand shot out, palm out and fingers stuck together in a shape of a spearhead. He aimed directly at Mingyu’s face. His foot was kept onto the mattress, while his other leg was still bent from its position.

But Mingyu evaded just as quickly.

He leaned to his side, far from where Jihoon attacked. His eyes were kept closed, even as he raised a hand to push Jihoon’s arm away. Jeonghan watched, as Jihoon continued. He stood, walked closer to Mingyu, silently and predatorily. Mingyu was still on the same spot where his legs were folded under him. Jihoon kicked, but Mingyu was able to push his leg away by grabbing him by the ankle. Losing his balance, Jihoon twisted and braced his palms open to soften his fall. Using Mingyu as leverage, he raised his other leg and fully twisted his body.

It took a while, Jihoon continuously trying to hit Mingyu with his limbs, and Jeonghan sitting in various positions, watching and observing Mingyu’s skill. Both Mingyu and Jihoon were sweating, the sun rising up to its fullest.

Mingyu was getting good, but not yet better.

Jihoon managed to hit Mingyu at the side of his head, causing Mingyu to lose his concentration and fall onto his side. He yelped, releasing his hold on Jihoon’s ankle. Jeonghan whistled. Mingyu was getting better, of course. But there were still some chips in his concentration.

Jihoon fell onto the mattress with a thud. It was muffled by groans and aching noises from Mingyu, who lost all the feeling of his legs for sitting on them for too long. Jeonghan barked out a laughter, while Jihoon shook his head.

“And you were doing so well, too,” Jeonghan said, standing up to help Mingyu. Mingyu winced as the blood began to flow back to his legs.

“We’ve been through this a million times, Mingyu,” Jihoon scolded, dusting his pants as he stood upright. Mingyu sat straight, his legs stretched in front of him as he continued to rub feeling into them.

“I got distracted.” Mingyu pouted.

Jihoon frowned. “Distracted? None of us were making any noise--”

“There you guys are,” Seungcheol said behind them. They all turned to him. Seungcheol was wearing a black suit, a white dress shirt underneath with a blazer over it. His slacks were sleek, and clean. He also pulled and loosened his tie with a painful look. Jihoon rolled his eyes.

“See,” Mingyu said, trying to get justification for his distraction. Jihoon rolled his eyes again, and even harder.

“Fine,” Jihoon consented. “But it’s still something you’re going to have to work on.”

“Where are the rest?” Jeonghan asked, as he stood to greet Seungcheol. Seungcheol hung his blazed onto his arm, as his other hand tried to pry the dress shoes off. Jeonghan offered his arm for support, which Seungcheol gladly took.

“They’ll follow,” Seungcheol said, as he flopped onto the mattress. “God, it’s been a long day. Can we please go back to the apartment, and order in? I’m hungry.” Seungcheol whined.

Jihoon rolled his eyes _again_ , and opened his mouth to retort, but a loud rumbling sound came from behind him that made him stop. He turned around, and saw Mingyu clutching his stomach, and bent in half. His cheeks dusted pink in embarrassment. He’d roll his eyes again, but Jihoon feared a headache more. Instead, he pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed deeply.

Mingyu smiled widely, knowing that it was time to eat (again).

Seungcheol slumped onto the dining room chair, his arm spread on top of the table. He groaned loudly in complaint. Mingyu pulled a chair in front of Seungcheol, and sat down, his arm around his stomach to calm its rumbling. Jeonghan, on the other hand, began to order from one of their favorite spots, smiling at Seungcheol and Mingyu.

Jihoon shook his head, wondering how he ended up with such lazy asses. He went and sat on the couch, sprawling on top of it. (If Seungcheol, their “de facto” leader, and Mingyu, the heir, was allowed to just slump all over the place, then so could he.)

“Sorry, excuse me,” Jeonghan said, glancing worriedly at Seungcheol. Seungcheol caught the look in Jeonghan’s eyes, and his eyes narrowed, and he frowned deeply. Jihoon watched from where he was lying down when Jeonghan walked out the kitchen, and closer to Seungcheol.

Jeonghan went beside Seungcheol, who stood up and listened in after Jeonghan pressed on the speaker button. “ _What_?”

“Hyung-nim,” the voice trembled. “There was a gunshot, not too far from here. We think it’s near ahjumma’s place.” Jihoon sat straight. Mingyu’s face scrunched into a frown.

“And we think,” the voice gulped, breath noisy in a poor attempt to calm down. “We think Soonyoung hyung-nim is in there.”

The front door slammed open. They all jumped, but kept in position. Jeonghan reached for a hidden gun taped under the table. Seungcheol stood in a stance, one foot behind him, and his fists raised in front of him. Mingyu inched closer to the kitchen to reach for some knives. Jihoon reached for Junhui’s spare staff behind the couch.

“Soonyoung?” Junhui gasped loudly. Seungcheol relaxed, brows furrowed further down the middle. Jeonghan caught Junhui just before his face met the ground. Mingyu helped in supporting Junhui onto the chair adjacent to the couch, the seat closer to the door. They waited until Junhui caught his breath.

“Fuck,” Junhui said, covering his eyes with the crook of his arm. “Soonyoung’s not _fucking here_.”

“What happened, Junhui,” Seungcheol ordered. Junhui took a deep breath before slowly lowering his arm. He blinked, scratching his head, messing his hair. His face showed annoyance and frustration.

“Just received a call from one of the stalls. Said they heard a lot of noise, like things being thrown around, and a few screams.” All of them froze. The air thickened. Jihoon felt the blood pumping through his veins, the noise echoing in his ears. They all held their breaths. “They said it was near ahjumma’s place.”

Seungcheol cursed, the chair he sat on screeching at the movement. He paced, biting his thumbnail. Calculations and suppositions running through his head in bits and pieces. But Jihoon stayed still. His hands curled into fists. It helped ground him.

“And Soonyoung was really there?” Jeonghan finally asked, because Jihoon couldn’t bring himself to.

Junhui nodded heavily. “How do you even _know_?” Jihoon hissed, eyes narrowing at Junhui even when the question was directed at Seungcheol.

Seungcheol frowned. “We were separated so that we could hold more ground.”

“You didn’t take _other men with you_?” Jihoon said, standing up, and his patience was wearing thin.

“Of _course_ we took men with us.” Seungcheol glared back at Jihoon, hating the insinuation that he’d let any part of their family go without backup. “We all took three or four men _with us.”_

Jihoon sat back down, guilty at his accusation. He knew Seungcheol. He knew Seungcheol wouldn’t do something like that, especially not to family. Seungcheol sighed deeply, running a hand down his face, and Jihoon saw the worry lines.

“It was just supposed to be a quick check. Asking the owners if there were any trouble, making sure they can contact us if they find any… It was just a simple investigation. We weren’t told to engage.” Seungcheol continued. Jeonghan stood behind him, rubbing soothing circles between his shoulder blades. Seungcheol leaned at the touch, sighing out of relief this time, with his eyes closed.

When he opened his eyes, he looked directly at Jihoon. “We all said we’d be done a bit after noon. Get back here until we were called to another family meeting, with Mingyu, this time.” At the corner of his eyes, Jihoon noticed that Mingyu stiffened for a second, before relaxing. This was something he had to get used to. He was the heir. Seungcheol clapped Mingyu’s shoulder, before walking to sit next to Jihoon on the couch. They turned back to Junhui to continue.

“I called the people with Soonyoung,” Junhui began, and Jihoon’s head snapped back at him. Junhui’s face was dark, his skin almost ashen in color. He swallowed before continuing. “After I received the message that there was a gunshot near ahjumma’s place, I called one of the people supposedly with Soonyoung.”

He ran a hand down his face, while they waited for him. “He said Soonyoung told them to go ahead. He wanted to pass by ahjumma’s place again. Said that there was something nagging at him, and that he’d catch up quickly. That he’d call or message me or Seungcheol soon. They were having lunch a few stalls away from ahjumma’s place. Then there was another gunshot.”

The movement was quick. Seungcheol caught Jihoon’s wrist and slammed him back down onto the couch. Jihoon struggled against Seungcheol’s hold, not caring that Seungcheol was bigger than him in height and muscles. His wrists were held with one hand, while Seungcheol’s other hand kept his torso onto the couch. Seungcheol’s knees stopped his legs from kicking about.

“Soonyoung’s at the restaurant, Cheol!” Jihoon yelled, struggling harder. Mingyu blocked the door beside Junhui, the only exit they had in their house. Jeonghan watched, stayed behind Seungcheol in case Jihoon successfully squirmed his way out of Seungcheol’s grip.

“I know,” Seungcheol said. His tone was calm, and his voice was deep. He was using that annoying voice where he expected everyone to understand that he was the eldest, what he says goes, and he hoped everyone will understand his decision.

Fuck that.

“Then let me go to him!” Jihoon cried out, his head nearly hitting Seungcheol’s nose. But there was a reason Seungcheol was the main teacher for Mingyu’s training. Thankfully, Seungcheol’s reflexes helped him avoid getting hit by Jihoon’s forehead. That didn’t mean Jihoon stopped struggling.

“Jihoon.” Seungcheol said curtly, and Jihoon fought _so hard_ not to cry. The tone of voice Seungcheol used was rarely used towards Jihoon. Besides his temper, Jihoon didn’t need much guidance from Seungcheol. They’ve known each other for years, even before they worked for Mingyu’s father. Jihoon knew that tone of voice, and it’s what scared him the most.

It meant that they weren’t going to do anything.

It meant that they had to leave Soonyoung inside the restaurant as a hostage.

Dread filled Jihoon completely, as he ran out of energy to struggle against Seungcheol’s hold. His eyes were wide and glistening. Slowly, Seungcheol released his hold on Jihoon’s wrists, and carefully lifted his weight off the couch.

“Junhui’s gonna go back. He’s gonna meet up with the people Soonyoung was with,” Seungcheol explained slowly, articulating each word he said. He glanced at Junhui quickly, and Junhui nodded before exiting the door. He turned back. Jihoon looked like he was in a trance. His eyes were glazed, wet with unshed tears. As much as Seungcheol felt the same about wanting to go after Soonyoung, rushing into the situation head first was just asking for trouble.

And he needed Jihoon level headed for this.

“He’s going to call once he gets a visual on the situation. We don’t need the police involved in the territory dispute.” Seungcheol continued, moving to sit beside Jihoon on the couch instead. At the side, Mingyu was softly sobbing, but Seungcheol couldn’t blame him. Mingyu always had a soft heart. “One small move and it could go badly for Soonyoung. He’s protecting the ahjumma and three more of her employees.”

It all sounded like white noise to Jihoon, but his subconsciousness knew. It understood Seungcheol’s words, though it seemed to pass from one ear and out the other. Everything was a blur.

“Ji,” Seungcheol called, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing. “Ji, we need a plan.”

“I can’t…” Jihoon whispered. It didn’t feel like he was the one who said it. It was as if someone else was in his body instead. He turned to Seungcheol, just a small movement of the head. Seungcheol removed his hand from Jihoon’s shoulder. He sounded different, broken. “Cheol, I can’t.”

Seungcheol clenched his fists, knowing that hugging Jihoon wouldn’t help him. He was one of the most, if not the only, brilliant strategist among the Kim Group. His plans were simple to understand, yet it gets the work done every time. Knowing Jihoon, he had plans that reached the letter Z.

But then, the Jihoon in front of him was breaking down. Jihoon’s breath was quickening, a sign that he was trying to stop himself from crying but he was about to break. Seungcheol had known Jihoon for a long time, but it was the first time he saw Jihoon struggling so much with his feelings.

“Trust Soonyoung, Ji.” Seungcheol found himself saying because it was the only comfort he could provide his best friend.

But it was the final straw.

The first tear fell when Jihoon blinked. He hiccupped, a sob escaping his lips. His hands reached to cover his face as he bent forward, curling into himself. His shoulders shook, and he doesn’t even know why he’s crying.

They work for the mob, for goodness’ sake. Situations like this was to be expected. In fact, the hostage situation was one of the tamer ones! Yet Jihoon couldn’t handle it. Couldn’t handle the wrack of sobs that made it difficult to breathe. The continuous onslaught of tears falling down his cheeks, and snot from his nose. He doesn’t look particularly like the Jihoon everyone knew. He didn’t care.

All there was, was Soonyoung left alone in a hostage situation, with no update about the it. Junhui hadn’t messaged them yet, so it meant that there was no visual. Soonyoung was one of the strong ones, save for Seungcheol. He knew how to take care of himself in case shit hit the fan, but the grim reminder that Soonyoung might sacrifice himself just to save the ahjumma and her other workers froze Jihoon’s blood.

(It was something Soonyoung would do, Jihoon had no doubts about it.)

Jihoon lied down, his head tucked between Jeonghan’s shoulder and chin. Jeonghan combed his hair to calm him down, and it worked for the worst of it. Jihoon stopped hiccupping. There were a few stray tears that fell left, but it didn’t fall as freely as a few moments (minutes? hours?) ago.

Mingyu sat on the chair adjacent to the couch. His face was grim, but he looked more like a kicked puppy than anything. Seungcheol sat at the other end of the couch, beside Jihoon, rubbing a hand on the small of his back. He kept his eyes on his phone, never letting it sleep.

The sudden ring caused them all to jump.

Seungcheol stood, running a hand through his hair as he answered and pressed the speaker button. “Junhui.”

“Didn’t have time to call for backup.” Junhui responded quickly, out of breath. “Ahjumma and her workers are fine. Slightly traumatized. None of them were hurt.”

“Soonyoung? What about Soonyoung?” Jeonghan asked frantically from the couch.

Junhui sighed, a frustrated sigh, on the other end of the line. “Idiot got himself stabbed. We’re on our way to the hospital.” The sound of the siren was far, but too loud in Jihoon’s ears.

“It’s artificial.” Soonyoung croaked, and the lump in Jihoon’s throat returned.

“The fucking _hell_ it’s artificial, Soonyoung! You have an _open wound_ \--”

“Junhui. Shut up.” Soonyoung said, curt and short. Soonyoung doesn’t use that tone of voice unless he was serious, and Jihoon’s can’t believe he’s using it to shut Junhui up. Was it for their sake? So that they wouldn’t worry about him bleeding buckets?

“Wha-- don’t tell me to shut up, Soonyoung! You got yourself into this mess, and I have to report to the family!”

“Report directly to the main family, then. I’m fine.” His tone was cold, but his voice was cracking, dry like he hadn’t spoken in days. “It’s not as if I was tortured. Just a miscalculation on my part.”

Then all of a sudden, his tone was light, joking. Like he wasn’t stabbed, and he merely slipped and fell on his ass. Junhui sighed heavily. There was a light thump on the other end of the line, and a whine from Soonyoung. “I’m injured!”

“ _Yeah_ , well.” Junhui said, before talking to Seungcheol again. “We’re at the hospital. I don’t think anyone’s suspicious, but we might have to watch our territories more after today.”

The sound of a car lock being undone, and a door opened. It was muffled, but Jihoon knew they were getting the gurney out. It was squeaky at the weight, and the wheels bounced on the ground. Junhui grunted when he got off the ambulance.

“He’ll probably just get a few stitches. It really was a miscalculation on his part.” Junhui said, rushing and breathing heavily as they ran towards the emergency room. “Will you pick him up? I need to inform the family, and double check on ahjumma.”

“We’ll pick him up. Go straight to the family. Jeonghan, Mingyu, and I will check on ahjumma.” Seungcheol ordered, looking at Jeonghan and Mingyu. Jihoon’s hand tightened on the hold he had on Seungcheol’s wrist ever since Seungcheol said Junhui’s name. It was tight enough, and the color of Seungcheol’s skin was changing because of it, but Seungcheol didn’t pry it away.

“Thanks.” Junhui said, and he ended the call.

Jeonghan and Mingyu nodded, as they rushed to get weapons just in case. Seungcheol glanced at Jihoon. His eyes were wide with worry, and the tears the dried up minutes ago glistened again. Seungcheol opened his mouth to start, but his phone rang again.

Furrowing his brows, Seungcheol swiped to answer. “FORGOT TO TELL JIHOON I LOVE HIM!” Soonyoung bellowed through the phone, and even if it wasn’t on speaker, it was loud enough for Jihoon to hear. Seungcheol and Jihoon’s eyes widened in surprise. Seungcheol pressed the loud speaker.

“Sir, sir _please_! Sit still!” A desperate sounding nurse begged on the other line. Soonyoung grunted, and the bed seemed to squeak at the force of his weight.

“Ji, Jihoonie!” Soonyoung said, his tone chipper for someone who was just released from a hostage situation, and ended up with a stab wound. “I love you!”

It was followed with a thump, and a loud ‘ow!’ from Soonyoung. “I’m _injured_!”

“If you can withstand moving so much while we have a _needle through your skin_ , you can handle getting slapped on the head!” The nurse on the other side scolded, but the tension within Jihoon broke.

“Sit still, idiot.” Jihoon’s voice was soft, scolding but fond. But it was the first thing he had said for the past few hours after his breakdown that Seungcheol’s eyes softened with a small smile.

“I’m fine, Ji,” Soonyoung said softly, more for Jihoon’s sake than anyone else’s. The other side seemed to have calmed down somewhat, since the nurse wasn’t scolding Soonyoung anymore. “I love you.”

“I--” The call ended abruptly, causing Seungcheol and Jihoon to widen their eyes in surprise. Jihoon stiffened as he held Seungcheol’s wrist that held the phone. After a few moments of silence, Seungcheol lowered and pocketed his phone, and turned to Jihoon.

“Were you just--”

“Shut up.” Jihoon’s face flushed a deep pink faster than Seungcheol’s ever seen. Seungcheol chuckled, an airless breath of laughter.

“You nearly--”

“Cheol, shut up!” Jihoon glared, stepping back until he fell onto the couch. He reached for the closest cushion and squeezed it tightly. Seungcheol ran another hand through his hair in disbelief. Jeonghan and Mingyu arrived seemingly looking the same, but to the trained eyes, there were hidden weapons tucked in the most inconspicuous places.

“You were about to confess!” Seungcheol said in delight, a smile still on his face even after the loud thud of the cushion hitting his face and nearly causing him to fall at the force of it. His own face turned pink at the impact, but mostly it was from the laughter.

Jeonghan and Mingyu turned to Jihoon, eyes very wide. Jihoon hid his face behind another cushion, his legs folded in front of him so he could hide even more. “Shut up, Cheol!” He said, muffled from hiding his face.

Jeonghan shook his head, and threw the cushion Seungcheol was holding beside Jihoon. The smile never left Seungcheol’s face. “Jeonghan, Mingyu and I will go to ahjumma and check the surroundings. Junhui’s on his way to report to the main family. Pick Soonyoung up, alright?”

If Jihoon made any other indication of hearing Seungcheol’s order, it was just that the very tip of his ears turning into a darker shade of pink.


	5. Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> merry christmas, and happy holidays! i'm so glad for the 3 wins boom boom currently has especially with soonhoon's kiss (hehehehe). anyway, i need to disclaim that this might be completely inaccurate in terms of fighting and medically. :(
> 
>  
> 
> **warning: DEPICTION OF VIOLENCE, GUN USE, AND MENTIONS OF BLOOD, AND MILD TORTURE**
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> 
> well, i think it's safe to say you can skip this chapter if you can't handle those mentioned above, since it's just soonyoung's POV of what happened during the last chapter. if you're okay without the details of what happened to soonyoung during the last chapter, then feel free to skip this.
> 
> OR you can just ctrl+f _“I’m gonna have to call,”_ and read from there. :D
> 
> ps. i did not read through this after writing it. if there are any types of mistakes, feel free to inform me! thank you! enjoy~

It started  _so fucking well_ , that morning. Soonyoung frowned as he entered his favorite restaurant, greeting his favorite ahjumma and nodding at the workers present. Normally, the restaurant would be buzzing with customers both for a snack and lunch from workers in the buildings beside the market, and even the employees within the marketplace themselves. Since it was a cozy restaurant, everyone who ate there always felt home.

As soon as Soonyoung entered, the lack of noise from the amount of customers disturbed him. In the middle of the store, Soonyoung’s eyes zoomed in a group of men. Three of them ate and laughed loudly. They had their feet raised up on the tables beside them, their shoes dirtying the table and chairs that surrounded them. No one else was inside besides the ahjumma and her workers.

Soonyoung glanced at them behind the counter. The ahjumma was subtly pushing her workers behind her, as if protecting them from the men. She was pretending not to be bothered by them, but Soonyoung saw her eyes narrowed whenever they made noise, complaints, and demands. As much as she tried to serve them herself, she couldn’t be cooking and serving at the same time. Unfortunately, that meant letting one of her workers stand closer to them.

That made them the brunt of the insults.

Soonyoung took a seat, closer to the counter and made sure to widen his peripherals with everything that’s happening. The ahjumma froze for a second when she saw him, but relaxed and threw him a grimace. Soonyoung nodded and smiled softly.

The demands grew louder and rowdier. Plates fell, and crashed, breaking them to pieces. The worker that stood near them clutched the round tray closer to her body. She squeaked, when they threw more plates to the floor. She looked like she was about to cry. Soonyoung clenched his fists under the table.

The men weren’t ordinary thugs. Soonyoung saw a glimpse of a tattoo on their wrist, hidden by the cuffs of the suits they were wearing. His eyes narrowed, and his brows furrowed. These men were part of the Kim Group, but in a different sector. Lower, unimportant, and forgettable.

The past few family meetings warned them about these types of situations. He heard that the restaurant was garnering extra annoying attention from outsiders. Soonyoung, at first, was relieved to know that the ahjumma’s business was growing, only to frown deeper into the meeting when he was told that they wanted the shop for themselves. Men at the bottom of the tier within the group making noise with their arrogance and ego.

Soonyoung couldn’t believe what he saw.

One of the men threw the plate still filled with food dangerously close to the worker’s feet. It smashed into pieces, the food still steaming hot because ahjumma liked serving her food fresh from the pot. Soonyoung’s eyes narrowed even further when he saw the worker’s shoulders shaking from fear.

“I thought I said I didn’t want it spicy!” The man that threw the plate yelled and stood. He maneuvered his body closer to the worker, and she shrunk. She kept her head down and Soonyoung was sure she was crying, but he commended her bravery not to turn and run.

At the back of his mind, Soonyoung vaguely thought of calling Seungcheol.

But the man’s hands shot out, gripping the worker’s collar as he pulled her closer to him. She flinched, turning her head to the side so that she wouldn’t look at him. The man snarled, eyes elevating from her chest to her face. His lips formed a sinister smile, ugly and disturbing. He raised on hand after he successfully unbuttoned a few from her shirt, and he caressed her face with one finger. He licked his lips.

Soonyoung knew how powerful he was, years of training under the Kim Group and Seungcheol under his belt. He knew that if he let go, he could break not only the restaurant itself, but the bones of the man that he saw harassed the girl.

Soonyoung’s hand snuck between the man and the worker, clutching the man’s neck tightly. He made sure to press against his Adam’s apple, effectively cutting off his oxygen. The man side-eyed him, glaring, but Soonyoung was unperturbed. He tightened his hold on the man’s neck. The man released the worker’s collar and clawed Soonyoung’s wrist.

The worker gasped, and wailed as she ran back to the counter. Soonyoung glanced at her and caught the ahjumma’s look. The ahjumma pulled the worker closer to her, the girl’s head under her chin and rubbed her back in an effort to comfort her. Soonyoung turned back to the man.

“This is a peaceful restaurant,” Soonyoung said, his voice thick and dangerous. “Eat quietly and mind your manners.” He tightened his grip even more as the man choked. The man’s face nearly turning blue before Soonyoung pushed him towards the table he and his friends were eating on. The man slid onto his back, pushing the dishes away as he gasped desperately for air to get back in his lungs.

The other two attacked quickly, but Soonyoung was quicker.

He blocked their lame attempt to punch him. He pushed their fists away before kicking their sides. He blocked with his forearm and used their momentum to push them towards the tables. The restaurant gave him the advantage of small movements, something he was always good at. But the more he blocked them, the angrier they became.

The men were more tenacious than Soonyoung thought, when they kept attacking him. At one point though, they stopped, surrounded him, and grabbed their guns. Soonyoung internally rolled his eyes, because of _fucking_ course.

They attacked him still, not with guns and Soonyoung noted that they needed to train the lower sectors of the group more. They tried to hit him with the handle of their guns, but Soonyoung evaded them. It was getting dull at one point, Soonyoung vaguely counting the damages they were going to pay in his head and how Jihoon was going to kill him for it. He was too distracted, underestimating the men for their amateur attacks until he heard the click of the gun.

The workers behind the counter yelled when a gunshot was fired through the wall. Soonyoung froze. Eyes wide and in panic. The man he choked moments ago stood near the counter, his gun pointed at the workers. Smoke escaped it, signifying that he was the one who just took the shot. The man’s neck was red, with prints from Soonyoung’s hand. He swallowed, as he raised his gun.

“Back down,” the man sneered, “or I won’t miss.”

The workers wailed louder, until the man yelled at them, forcing them to shut up. They whimpered and curled together. Soonyoung quickly searched for the ahjumma, but she looked pissed and worried. If it were a lighter situation, Soonyoung would have laughed at her annoyance. (But he was proud.)

The two other men Soonyoung was fighting finally knew how to work their guns. He heard two clicks from either side of him, and the cold feeling of the barrel touched his skin. He raised his hands to fold behind his head. He side-eyed them both. They shook from exhaustion and pain. Soonyoung made sure to hit a few vital parts just so they would faint faster.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t fast enough.

The one whose gun wasn’t pushed against his skin kicked his stomach with more force than Soonyoung expected. He coughed at the impact. He bent over, the pain rushing through him. The men hit him repeatedly, but this time, he had no means to defend.

“Kwon Soonyoung,” the man, the leader, the one who kept a gun pointed at the ahjumma and her workers, taunted.

Soonyoung stared at him from the position he was in. Glaring wouldn’t help him either way, and he’s always had that aloof atmosphere during fights. He loosened his face in some form of apathy. If he showed emotion, he’d be done for.

“Kwon Soonyoung,” the man repeated, “Choi Seungcheol’s second hand man. Kim Mingyu’s bitches.”

Soonyoung’s eyes twitched. The man was part of the lower half of the Kim Group. Probably a recruit that hadn’t made any progress in climbing up, but still drunk enough in power he doesn’t really have. He scanned the counter, making sure that no one was paying attention to the ahjumma and her workers now. There was no time to think of some plan, and he can’t exactly access his phone with two other men pointing his gun at him.

If he were lucky, the men he sent away would hear the gunshot, and they’d have known to contact Seungcheol or Junhui. But if there was one thing he learned training in the mafia, it was to always assume there would be no back up. All he needed was to get the ahjumma and the workers away from the place. Or at least, away from the guns.

He knew he should have listened to Jihoon instead of staring at his face.

The leader walked closer to him, his gun now trailing on the side of Soonyoung’s face. The barrel was cold on his skin. There was a menacing grin, a crazy look in the man’s face as if staring at Soonyoung held the answer to how to overthrow the Kim Group.

(Soonyoung made a mental note to remind Mingyu’s father about the training of the lower parts of the families. And the recruitment process. Because seriously.)

He winced when the barrel of the gun pressed tightly against his temple. The man grinded the gun hard. He chuckled darkly, seeing the pain he was inflicting on Soonyoung’s face.

“Nothing you can do now, huh,” he sneered, yanking Soonyoung by the collar and forcing him to stand at his eye level. The two other men released their hold on him as he stood. His head lolled around. His acting was something only idiots would believe, Jihoon used to say during their training days when all he wanted was to laze around. The leader smirked, the look in his eyes becoming crazier by the second. There was a manic smile that was starting to form on his lips when Soonyoung opened his eyes.

He struck Soonyoung’s head with the handle, knocking Soonyoung down. Soonyoung forced his upper body up, leaning heavily on his arm. He blinked and shook his head. Okay, nope, head shaking was bad. His vision was starting to clear.

“No!” Someone screeched, and Soonyoung forced his head up. He could feel the bruise starting to form and that wasn’t going to go well with Seungcheol. Or Jihoon.

The leader dragged the worker he was harassing closer to Soonyoung. She fought the entire way. She screamed, and she kicked, and she yanked her body away. But the man’s grip was ruthless, roughly pulling her before dropping her at his side, right in front of Soonyoung. He raised his gun and pointed it at her temple.

Soonyoung rested his entire weight on his side and swiftly kicking the leader’s leg. He caught his ankle and pushed, forcing the leader to fall back. The gun was fired just when it flew out from his grip. The bullet hit the wall, embedding itself through the concrete. Soonyoung tackled the man, forcing his hands down and away from the gun. He was able to land a hard punch on the leader’s jaw, causing him to struggle more. The two lackeys seemed shocked at the sudden brawl that they didn’t notice the worker crawling away.

“What are you idiots doing!” The leader yelled, snapping the lackeys out of their reverie. They tackled Soonyoung, grabbing him by the shoulders and the upper arms. They pulled him off their leader. He was glaring at him, but there was a menacing scowl on the leader’s face. Soonyoung quickly scanned the corner and found that the ahjumma was protecting her workers again. The pulled worker huddled behind the others in a small, comforting circle.

Soonyoung glanced back at the leader. One of the lackeys held his head up, while the other forced his body down on a kneeling position. Both his hands were held away from him in a tight grip on his wrists. Soonyoung found their guns at their feet, and he swore he’d like his hand back just to facepalm at the idiocy.

The leader stood, spitting out some blood as he scowled darker at Soonyoung. But Soonyoung wasn’t intimidated. He stared the leader’s eyes, regardless of their position. The leader seemed to have forgotten the ahjumma and her workers because he started beating Soonyoung. From the head, to the jaw, to the chest, to the stomach. Soonyoung coughed and gasped at each hit. His head was heavy, and his ears were ringing. This was going to be difficult to explain…

“You think you’re better than us?!” The leader started screaming, and Soonyoung knew he snapped. “You think that just because you’re working for the Boss’s bastard that you get to order us around?! Huh?!”

The hits were subpar from Soonyoung’s training, if he were to be honest. It wasn’t as sharp as Junhui’s fists. It wasn’t as heavy as Seungcheol’s. It wasn’t as aimed as Jeonghan’s. It wasn’t as successive as Jihoon’s. But that many hits in various places would do anyone in. Soonyoung flexed his wrists in the middle of the punches, timing his winces with the flexing to hide it. Their grip was a bit loose, just enough for Soonyoung to be able to maneuver, to be able to get the hidden butterfly knife.

He tasted the blood in his mouth. _God_ , he hated the taste of blood in his mouth.

The leader got tired of hitting him, and Soonyoung slumped down. The only thing holding him up were the grips on his wrists, and the hand pushing his head down. The leader kneeled in front of him, grasping his chin and forcing his head up.

“Sons of bitches,” the leader spat, “no one’s gonna listen to you. This is the mob, not some kindergarten. You think we’re gonna take orders from that bastard?” The grip on his chin was tight, though, and the taste of blood was flowing more in his mouth. But he needed to keep their attention on him.

So he snickered.

The leader released his grip on Soonyoung’s chin, and Soonyoung’s head lolled down his shoulders, his neck not being able to hold it up. He was sore all over, and the blood was disgusting on his tongue. His head was heavy, and his ears were still ringing. His vision was blurry, whether it was from the sweat or an open wound, he didn’t know.

Still, he snickered.

The leader’s nose flared in anger. He yanked Soonyoung by the hair, pulling him up roughly. But Soonyoung looked down on him from that angle, a smirk on his face. The leader’s veins seemed to boil as he began to hit Soonyoung again. From the stomach, to the ribs.

“You. Ain’t. Fuckin’. Shit!” The leader emphasized with each hit, and Soonyoung groaned and coughed for effect. As trained as his body was, he wasn’t going to be able to take any more hits. But he continued to laugh, to mock the leader because he was Kwon Soonyoung, and Jihoon would hit him himself if he were there.

Soonyoung raised his head to stare at the leader’s pissed off gaze. All rationality flew out the window as the leader forgot that they had guns in the first place. That they had hostages. The plan was working, and Soonyoung couldn’t ask for more. (That was a lie, he’d like to ask for some back up, at the very least.)

The leader looked satisfied with the beating Soonyoung was getting, and made a show out of it by shaking his fists to remove the blood. It wasn’t going to take long before he remembered about the guns and the hostages as his blood thirst for seeing Soonyoung bleeding was rising.

Then, at that moment, Soonyoung noticed men moving at the store’s entrance. He narrowed his eyes further, thankful for once that he had small eyes. It looked like he was on the verge of fainting, rather than checking his surroundings. There was a glare of the sun reflecting off of something from the door, and Soonyoung swore he could almost cry.

He side-eyed the two other lackeys, struggling his arms again to put on a show. Two of the men, Soonyoung recognized, snuck into the store quietly. They were crouched and calling for the ahjumma and her workers. Luckily, the ahjumma noticed and pushed her workers out. One of them whimpered, and Soonyoung’s eyes darted to look at the men’s faces. He groaned. Their faces didn’t seem to change, still directed at him with a sickeningly proud look. Soonyoung bit back a sigh of relief and continued to yank his arms away.

Once the last worker, the ahjumma, was outside, Soonyoung flexed his arms and pulled.

He used the lackeys’ grips on his wrists as leverage. He may not be as light as Jihoon, but he was still flighty. Soonyoung raised himself up, kicking the leader on the stomach, the chest, then square on the face.

Junhui moved in quickly, along with one other member. Soonyoung took the glint of Junhui’s _jian_ as an opportunity to twist around, still using the lackeys as leverage. One of them released his grip, and Soonyoung was able to reach for his hidden knife.

He swiftly cut the other lackey’s hold on his wrist, just a small cut at the cuff, but it was enough. These were the whiney members of the lower sector. A small cut that bled was going to give them something to panic about.

Soonyoung moved onto the leader as soon as Junhui’s back touched his. They needed to be quick because they had no guns with a place of civilians.

Soonyoung attacked the leader, punching him at perfect pressure points that stopped his movements for a moment. Junhui kicked the other lackey and hit him with the handle of his _jian_ before hitting him again with his sheath. There was a gunshot fired at the farther end of the room, and Junhui saw that their other member was struggling against the other lackey. He caught Soonyoung’s eyes and they nodded at each other.

Junhui ran towards the other lackey, ramming into him. Their other member was on the ground, holding his stomach. Junhui pulled his hand away and saw that he was bleeding. It was just a graze, but bleeding nonetheless. Junhui kicked the lackey on the stomach and kicking the gun away. Soonyoung grunted loudly. Junhui calculated their situation.

The other two members of theirs were taking care of ahjumma and the rest of the workers, and calling up the main family for clean up and medics. The other member was going to be down for a while, and the other lackey was finally out for the count. On the other side of the room, Soonyoung attacked the leader of the three, letting him fall to the ground before attacking the other lackey that Junhui was fighting, recovered and got back up. Junhui thought that the leader would stay down and focused on helping. But there was a glint at the corner of his eye that didn’t come from his _jian_.

As soon as Junhui turned around, the leader was on his feet, gripping Soonyoung’s butterfly knife.

Soonyoung was too busy with the other lackey, avoiding the gun being pointed at him and hitting the lackey on pressure points. Before Junhui could yell out Soonyoung’s name, the leader roared. Soonyoung turned around, and the leader stabbed him.

There was a sickening sound of flesh being torn open, and Soonyoung’s shirt was sporting a blooming blood flower. Soonyoung held the leader’s wrists against his as the leader pushed the knife deeper. Soonyoung cried at the pain. Junhui moved quickly, his _jian_ and his sheath at his sides, as Soonyoung managed to kick the leader away from him.

The leader’s eyes were wide, crazy. His pupils were dilated as he stared at his hands. He began laughing. Softly at first, before it grew louder and louder. He began to shake as Soonyoung staggered. Junhui rammed his _jian_ through the leader. The blade protruded through his body, and the laughter died down into a choking sound.

Junhui pulled his _jian_ out of the leader’s body, and let the man fall. His laughter turned into hiccups, but his body was still shaking. Soonyoung and Junhui looked at each other, then back down at the leader.

“You’re. No… body.” The leader wheezed before falling limp.

Soonyoung’s eyes grew wide in horror, but Junhui glared at the man. He didn’t pierce him in a critical place, and he’s pretty sure he avoided some deadly organs. The man would most likely live if they get someone to see to him.

A small thud in front of him reminded Junhui that Soonyoung was stabbed as well. Sliding to Soonyoung, he supported his back as they carefully sat down.

“Jihoon’s gonna kill you.” Junhui said. It made Soonyoung chuckle.

“Jihoon’s always out to kill me.”

“Well, if you’d just stop _harassing him_ for once,” Junhui replied, and it was an easy banter. Soonyoung snorted.

“Hyung-nim!” The other member that was taking care of the ahjumma and her workers ran back inside. “The ambulance arrived!”

Soonyoung groaned. This was supposed to be a covert mission. Now there was blood everywhere, and an ambulance waiting for them. Junhui was right; Jihoon was going to kill him.

“Someone else needed an ambulance. You’re not the only one here, y’know.” Soonyoung rolled his eyes as medics began to file inside the store. So much for no engagement.

The medics carried him to a gurney with Junhui following. He vaguely heard Junhui talking to the other medic, instructing him about the other guy bleeding on the ground. He heard the medic call that the man was still alive, and they hurried him to another gurney.

“Make sure he’s in another hospital. We need to come back for him.” Junhui said, voice cool and calm. The medic looked like he was about to argue, but Junhui just raised a brow at him. Soonyoung was being carried out the store, and he wanted to apologize to the ahjumma for the mess. But he didn’t see her or her workers before Junhui jumped up with him, and the doors of the ambulance closed. He narrowed his eyes as Junhui pulled out his phone.

“I’m gonna have to call,” Junhui said, glaring down at Soonyoung on the gurney. He nodded at the medic, who nodded back. “You know I’m gonna call.”

Soonyoung glared back at Junhui, a ‘don’t you fucking _dare_ ’ face. But Junhui’s sick of all the crap. He had no idea that fighting three men were going to be a problem, but having one of them point a gun at Soonyoung in the middle of the battle, and the other one attacking him from behind with a knife… Adrenaline still pumped through his veins, and he missed his lunch, so he’s very cranky.

“Junhui.” The other line answered. It was Seungcheol, his voice was strained and worried.

“Didn’t have time to call for backup.” He was still feeling out of breath from the adrenaline. “Ahjumma and her workers are fine. Slightly traumatized. None of them were hurt.”

Well, none of them were hurt _badly_ , at least. He saw one of the workers crying hysterically. Her hair was in disarray, no longer in a clean ponytail, as if it was yanked roughly. But none of them had physical wounds, and none of them were bleeding.

“Soonyoung? What about Soonyoung?” Jeonghan’s voice was far, but frantic. Junhui sighed, annoyed.

“Idiot got himself stabbed. We’re on our way to the hospital.”

“It’s artificial.” Soonyoung finally spoke, his voice cracking. With the amount of hits he’s had in the past hour or so, it was a wonder how he could still talk with all the injuries. But he strained to sit up, even. The medic’s eyes widened at Soonyoung’s answer while Junhui glared at him.

“The fucking _hell_ it’s artificial, Soonyoung! You have an _open wound--_ ”

“Junhui. Shut up.” Soonyoung said, curt and short. Junhui looked affronted.

“Wha-- don’t tell me to shut up, Soonyoung! You got yourself into this mess, and I have to report to the family!”

“Report directly to the main family, then. I’m fine. It’s not as if I was tortured.” Soonyoung’s voice was working well, despite the earlier croaking. Junhui snorted softly. “Just a miscalculation on my part.”

Junhui remembered the “miscalculation” as Soonyoung called it. He grimaced, while Soonyoung attempted a nonchalant shrug. He sighed heavily, wanting to hit him so bad.

So he did.

“I’m injured!” Soonyoung whined, but Junhui couldn’t find it in himself to care anymore.

“ _Yeah_ , well.” He said before talking back on the phone. “We’re at the hospital. I don’t think anyone’s suspicious, but we might have to watch our territories more after today.”

“No one’s suspicious, my ass,” Soonyoung grumbled, too low to be picked up by the phone. “There were a lot of gunshots, and we were picked up by an ambulance. How the hell would anyone not be suspicious.”

Junhui pointedly ignored him, jumping down from the ambulance with a grunt after they pulled the gurney with Soonyoung out. “He’ll probably just get a few stitches. It really was a miscalculation on his part.”

They rushed Soonyoung past the emergency room doors, calling out for doctors. Junhui fell behind them, ignoring the questions being asked and letting the nurses handle it.

“Will you pick him up? I need to inform the family, and double check on ahjumma.”

Seungcheol replied that they’d pick him up instead. Junhui stood beside Soonyoung’s bed after he was moved from the gurney (which he insisted on just standing up and walking to by himself).

“Thanks.” Junhui said, and he ended the cal.

He watched Soonyoung struggling against the hands of the nurses before throwing the phone at him. Clumsily, Soonyoung caught the phone, stopping his fidgeting. “I’m gonna go to the main family. I don’t know where your phone is, but I think _someone_ would appreciate an actual call from you.” And Junhui left.

Soonyoung’s eyes grew wider, despite the cotton being dabbed on his wound. One of the nurses grabbed at the phone so that they could have a better view of his wound, but he resisted, twisting and turning while re-dialing the number Junhui just called.

“FORGOT TO TELL JIHOON I LOVE HIM!” He yelled, ignoring the pain at his side because there were more important things right now.

“Sir, sir _please_! Sit still!” The nurse who was reaching for his phone begged him. Soonyoung avoided the hands again. He grunted, but whether it was from the pain at his side or the exertion, it didn’t matter.

“Ji, Jihoonie!” He said, happy and light, though breathless. “I love you!”

The head nurse, the one who kept dabbing on his wound while he was struggling against the other nurses to avoid that grabby hands on his phone, hit the back of his head hard.

“Ow!” Soonyoung whined, ceasing his struggling again, and glaring at the head nurse. Unperturbed, she continued to stitch his wound. “I’m _injured_!” He whined again, because that was the second time someone hit his head despite bleeding his stomach out.

“If you can withstand moving so much while we have a _needle through your skin_ , you can handle getting slapped on the head!” The head nurse scolded as she pulled the needle through, her arm stretching wide.

“Sit still, idiot.” Jihoon’s voice was soft, scolding but fond. Soonyoung calmed down, and lied back down on the recliner. His entire face softened.

“I’m fine, Ji,” he replied softly. He closed his eyes and smiled. “I love you.”

“I--” The phone was snatched by the other nurse, finally, as she was heaving heavily from the other side of the bed. Soonyoung looked affronted, but the pinching on his thigh warned him not to move as the head nurse was tying up the final stitch. He made an incomprehensible sound that made him sound like a child, reaching for the phone. She glared at him, and he closed his mouth.

“He was going to say something.” Soonyoung pouted. “I wanted to hear his voice.”

The head nurse stood, cutting the thread, and wiping her forehead. She rolled her eyes as she moved away to let the other nurses attend to the rest of his bruises and wounds. She ruffled his head carefully, avoiding the possible cuts and barrel shaped bruises at his temple. “You’ll live.”


	6. Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took a while to complete. i suddenly had adult commitments. but with this, it concludes this title! i can now fully concentrate on the meanie title (it had plot holes that i ran away from hence...)!
> 
> thank you all for reading this soonhoon prequel even when the meanie main title wasn't finished yet. 8u8 thanks for reading, giving kudos, and writing comments! thank you for loving this fic despite all its loopholes and confusing writing styles. now, with this finished, i can concentrate on finishing _kiss kiss (fall in)_ , and probably work on the junhao one ~~/two~~ -shot.
> 
> in any case, please enjoy the final chapter!

The door opened as silently as it could, so as to not bother.

“I don’t want it. Whatever you have, give it to some other patient.” Soonyoung said, his arm over his eyes, blocking the light of the ceiling. His body started aching, the adrenaline now flushed out of his system. A doctor checked over his stab wound, and though he wasn’t in critical danger, they had wanted him to stay for a while to see if the stitches would stick.

“I guess you don’t need me, then.” Soonyoung’s eyes snapped open, his arm hitting the bed as he sat straight up.

Jihoon stood near the door with a basket of fruits. His jacket swallowed his form. He wore glasses that were too big for his face, and that made him look younger than he actually was. Slowly, he shuffled inside, the basket rustling against his jacket and making soft white noise. He stopped right beside Soonyoung’s bed, eyes straight down. Not once had he looked at Soonyoung’s face.

“I’ll always need you, Jihoon,” Soonyoung said, with a soothing voice that was so rare for him. The lump in his throat returned. Jihoon swallowed down a sob. Soonyoung was fine. Soonyoung was fine, was here, was joking.

Soonyoung cupped his cheek, slowly raising his head to look at him. There was a soft smile on his face. It was the smile that he always saw on Soonyoung when he’d catch him looking at him. It was filled with pride, satisfaction, joy. Jihoon’s face crumpled.

Then, he slapped Soonyoung’s head.

“Ow! What the hell, Ji--” Soonyoung held the side of his head where Jihoon slapped him.

“Call! Or message us! Next time,” Jihoon hiccuped, the fruit basket now on the hospital floor. He struggled keeping his arms on his sides. He fisted his hands. “Next time, you tell us first before you follow through your idiocy.”

There was a huge lump in his throat that he couldn’t swallow down. The feeling of the onslaught of tears prickled his eyes. But he glared at Soonyoung, determined. Soonyoung rubbed his head, soothing the pain of Jihoon’s slap. He bit his lip and grimaced.

“There wasn’t time,” Soonyoung whispered. It wasn’t like Jihoon didn’t know. This was the ahjumma that Soonyoung had been talking to for God knows how long, and Soonyoung was friendly, and easily attached. (Traits he never thought fit in the mafia life, but Soonyoung managed to defy the odds anyway.) “They had guns, and ahjumma was there.”

“I know that.” Jihoon almost screamed. Soonyoung pulled his head to the crook of his neck. They stood at the side of the bed in silence. Soonyoung’s thumb was caressing his cheek, his palm warm on his neck. There were no tears being shed, but with the way Jihoon was trembling, he might as well have.

Soonyoung pulled gently to sit them on the bed, but he felt a tug at his shirt. He glanced down to see Jihoon’s hands, sleeves swallowing them by the large jacket, clutching tightly. Soonyoung wrapped his other arm around Jihoon’s waist and fell black.

Jihoon twitched, startled at the movement. He raised himself with his arms. Soonyoung was splayed on the bed with a crooked smile. His hair was a mess on the bed, too. But what Jihoon noticed was the smallest wince Soonyoung made when they landed.

“You idiot!” Jihoon scolded because that fall could have opened Soonyoung’s wound! And he was pretty sure Jihoon’s weight was no joke on it.

But Soonyoung’s arm was still around his waist, and his other hand had moved to brush Jihoon’s fringe away from his forehead. Jihoon glanced at his stomach, before up at his face. Soonyoung’s face didn’t change. His sharp eyes stared at him full of love and pride. Jihoon wanted to hit him again.

“I’m fine, Ji,” Soonyoung whispered, pulling his head closer to his again, until their foreheads touched. Soonyoung closed his eyes now, a serene look on his face. Jihoon still looked worried, if not irked. He tried to keep his weight off of Soonyoung, especially his lower body.

An embarrassing realization made him jerk out of Soonyoung’s face.

He stumbled on the fruits on the ground with a thud. Soonyoung sat straight, his face asking if Jihoon was alright.

Jihoon kept his face down, hiding his blush. He also didn’t think he could look at Soonyoung properly just yet, after he realized that Soonyoung wasn’t exactly wearing anything other than the hospital clothing. (Sure, he might have been wearing underwear, but still.)

“Ji?” Soonyoung asked, and Jihoon hated how it was affecting him.

With burning ears, Jihoon began picking up the fallen fruit. He held a handful of them before realizing he had no basket to place it in. The basket he brought in earlier was a few steps away, as it rolled when it fell. He didn’t know if things could get any more awkward.

“Yah, Lee Jihoon.” Soonyoung’s voice was still soft, fond.

“Why is it even me,” Jihoon whispered, his frantic movements stopping. He kept his head down, his thumb playing with the fruits on his lap.

“Does it matter?” Jihoon’s head snapped up, eyes widening at the casual tone in Soonyoung’s voice. His face was serious, even though he was smiling. He reached out a hand to help Jihoon up, and tentatively, cautiously, Jihoon took it.

The arrangement was quick and slightly uncomfortable in a too-narrow hospital bed. Soonyoung pulled Jihoon up and then lied down. He shimmied, moved them around so that they were lying down on the bed properly. One arm held around Jihoon’s shoulder, and the other over his waist. He twisted a bit more so that they were almost facing each other, but not entirely side by side because it was too cramped for that. He tucked Jihoon’s face under his chin, Jihoon’s nose touching his collarbone.

Soonyoung’s thumb caressed his neck, and it shouldn’t have been as soothing as it was. Jihoon breathed in and out slowly, trying to calm his heart down and trying to swallow the lump in his throat. Of all the times he felt like crying…

“I can’t really… remember when,” Soonyoung began, continuing his absentminded caressing, and even still pulling Jihoon closer than he already was. “It’s just that suddenly, you were everywhere.”

Jihoon’s eyes narrowed, because of _course_ he was everywhere. They lived together. But Jihoon kept his mouth shut, wanting to hear more of Soonyoung’s explanation.

“And then suddenly, it wasn’t enough. Suddenly, I needed to see you. Suddenly, I needed to know what you were doing. Suddenly, I needed to know where you were. Suddenly, I needed to know you were safe. Suddenly, I needed you beside me. Suddenly…” Soonyoung paused, and so did his caressing. Jihoon felt the deep breath Soonyoung took, and the shaky exhale he had after, as if he was also trying not to cry.

“Suddenly, I realized I was in love with you.”

Jihoon bit his bottom lip, tucking and squirming even closer to Soonyoung. His hand was stuck between them, and it made moving a bit more difficult. His other reached for Soonyoung, to know that he was still physically there, though they were close enough that not even air can pass through them if it tried. He shut his eyes tight, and curled the hand between their bodies into a fist. Something to ground him to the overwhelming emotion running through his veins. He didn’t want to cry.

Soonyoung’s hand moved from his waist to his jaw, tilting it up while he squirmed his body just a bit to look at Jihoon in the eyes. The soft touch of Soonyoung’s rough hands, an odd juxtaposition on Jihoon’s skin, but he couldn’t help it. Slowly, his eyes open and it was glassy with unshed tears. Soonyoung doesn’t really expect him to cry now.

Soonyoung’s lips twitched into a small smile, because he was happy. Jihoon was here, beside him and not pushing him away. The surge of euphoria felt even better than the medicinal morphine. Subconsciously, Soonyoung stroked Jihoon’s sharp jaw with his thumb this time as he leaned his forehead onto Jihoon’s. Jihoon’s eyes were crossed, not entirely sure where to look, but settled on Soonyoung’s nose instead. It was less intense than looking at Soonyoung’s eyes that close.

“It didn’t matter to me,” Soonyoung continued, “why I suddenly fell in love with you. I didn’t bother questioning it because whenever I tried thinking about it, all I could see was your face…”

Soonyoung pushed their heads apart, and Jihoon had no other choice but to look at Soonyoung’s face directly now. But the smile on Soonyoung’s lips grew wider, and his face was obviously proud at his next declaration.

“And all I could do was smile.”

Jihoon twisted his body, angling it to directly face Soonyoung’s. He reached both his hands and lightly slapped Soonyoung’s chest. Repeatedly, in embarrassment.

But Soonyoung doesn’t let go. He tugged Jihoon closer, now that Jihoon was facing him. Though he winced when his weight pressed onto his wound.

Jihoon stilled, remembering where they were. He pushed away from Soonyoung’s chest, and his eyes darted from Soonyoung’s pained expression, then to his stomach. The wound didn’t open, and that was good, but Jihoon needed to move away to avoid it.

Which Soonyoung definitely wasn’t having.

He pulled Jihoon close again, the hand on Jihoon’s jaw was wide and it felt like it could cover his entire face. Jihoon was tucked in again, between Soonyoung’s neck and collarbone, and he took the opportunity to hide. He stopped squirming, stopped hitting Soonyoung, painfully aware that his movements could aggrevate Soonyoung’s wound.

So he settled instead by wrapping his arm around Soonyoung’s waist and pushing them even closer than before.

The weight around his waist was tight, and it added a bit of weight on his wound, but Soonyoung didn’t let it bother him. He was finally hugging Jihoon tightly without being pushed away. Soonyoung propped his chin on top of Jihoon’s head, sighing happily at their position. It was oddly comfortable, but he attributed it to being able to hold his most precious person.

His eyes were feeling heavy. The warmth Jihoon’s body passed through to his own, and the staccato rhythm of Jihoon’s heartbeat became a lullaby. He could feel his hold on Jihoon’s jaw slacking, and his other arm straightening out from under Jihoon’s shoulder. Belatedly, he realized that Jihoon was rubbing soft circles on his back, and fitting himself even more perfectly, like the last puzzle piece before a picture was completed.

Just before the last string of his consciousness slipped, he barely heard Jihoon’s whisper, “I can’t believe I’m in love with you too.”

 

* * *

 

The moment Soonyoung was released from the hospital, it was as if nothing changed between them. Not that Soonyoung minded. Except Jihoon made it a point to have Junhui or Seungcheol tell him to stay in bed. To not move, to not sit up, to _stop squirming, Kwon_.

“Hyung,” Soonyoung whined when it was Seungcheol’s shift to make sure Soonyoung wasn’t going to move randomly. He hadn’t moved from the bed since Jihoon pushed him and told him not to move a muscle. It’s been _at least_ two days and Soonyoung was going to go crazy if he doesn’t move soon.

“Jihoon says you gotta stay, so you gotta stay.”

Soonyoung groaned, because everyone of them knew he was weak to Jihoon, even just a _mention_ of Jihoon’s name. He dragged an arm and covered his eyes. The bed was cold, despite the hot day outside, and the fact that he was under his blanket and duvet.

Seungcheol turned the page of his book and pushed his glasses up. “You do know you don’t _have_ to listen to Jihoon, right?”

Soonyoung smiled even if he kept his arm covering his eyes. He knew he could just sit up and walk around the house, and Jihoon wouldn’t be able to do anything. But he knew that this was the only way how Jihoon could show he cared, could show he was worried. He knew that Seungcheol knew that too. They let Jihoon do it anyway.

“God _damn_ , you’re whipped, Kwon,” Seungcheol commented, after a loud thud of a closed book. Soonyoung peaked under his arm, but his smile was still there. He wasn’t going to deny it because he definitely was. Seungcheol leaned forward, his elbows on his knees as he placed his cheek on his palm. There was a smirk there, but Soonyoung didn’t bother.

“He was about to confess, you know,” Seungcheol said, eyes carefully watching Soonyoung’s reaction. The only reason why Seungcheol knew there was going to be a reaction was because he knew them both for a really long time. Soonyoung’s palm twitched, and there was a tenseness in his limbs. It was the only signal Seungcheol got that Soonyoung was, in fact, still listening and hasn’t fallen asleep yet.

“Right before your call ended. He started saying it, too.” Seungcheol leaned back, wanting to gauge Soonyoung’s reaction more. “I just don’t get why you won’t just get together and get it over with.”

Soonyoung removed his arm from his face as he gave a low, dry chuckle. “You tell me. He’s _your_ best friend.”

“You’re the one _in love_ with him,” Seungcheol countered, and again, Soonyoung wasn’t one to deny how whipped he was for Lee Jihoon.

“Doesn’t it hurt?” The atmosphere around them became serious. It was a genuinely concerned question. Seungcheol can’t choose sides, and Soonyoung understood that. Soonyoung was prepared to leave their group, to move to another sector of the family because he knew that even though Seungcheol can’t explicitly choose sides, he would choose Jihoon regardless.

“Does it matter?” Soonyoung repeated the exact same words he told Jihoon days prior, back at the hospital. He meant the question, because to him, it didn’t. It doesn’t. Seungcheol wanted to applaud Soonyoung’s tenacity because unrequited love was a _bitch_.

“You’re gonna have to talk to him, y’know,” Seungcheol said, taking his book and standing. He made his way to the door and held the knob.

“I know, hyung.”

“You’re also not really on bed arrest, you know that, right?” Seungcheol breathed out a chuckle, as did Soonyoung.

“I know that too, hyung.”

Seungcheol turned around, releasing his hold on the knob to talk to Soonyoung before he left for the family meeting, switching out for Jihoon next, somehow. His eyes were serious, so were Soonyoung’s, but there was a spark in Soonyoung’s eyes as he slowly sat up the bed.

“How far down that grave are you, Kwon?” Seungcheol asked jokingly but genuinely concerned, because he was worried about them both. Jihoon had been denying his feelings for Soonyoung for a long time, and Seungcheol knew that there was only so much rejection a normal human being could handle.

But Soonyoung smiled, soft and fond, and if Seungcheol could see what was in his mind, he would see Jihoon, smiling and laughing.

“Hyung,” Soonyoung said, looking at Seungcheol directly in the eyes despite their distance. The mirth that was usually in them, gone and Seungcheol could see it clearer than crystal. His lips curled into a proud smile. “I’m still falling.”

 

* * *

 

“You’re supposed to be _in bed_.”

“You were supposed to be _beside me_ , but I guess that’s both of us who didn’t do what we were ‘supposed’ to be doing.” Soonyoung answered with a shrug, leaning on the wall to watch Jihoon in the kitchen. There was a copper pot on the stove, the lid beginning to jump at the boiling water inside. Jihoon shook a few packets, loosening the contents inside. The pot whistled.

“They’re all out today,” Jihoon said, just to fill in the silence around them. He doesn’t turn around as he concentrated on cooking the ramyeon. “Family meeting and patrol.”

Soonyoung walked closer, not minding that Jihoon wasn’t looking at him. “I kinda figured.” As soon as he got close enough, he couldn’t keep his smile when he noticed that the tip of Jihoon’s ears were bright pink. Jihoon’s eyes were frantically looking around, his hands were fidgeting, and he was rolling the balls of his feet front, then back, and he was  _still not looking at Soonyoung_.

“Yah, Lee Jihoon,” Soonyoung said again, similar to the tone in the hospital, with a very fond voice that Jihoon didn’t know how to react to.

The pot whistled again, and Jihoon reached out for it, forgetting to get a pot holder. He yanked his hand back at the heat, only for Soonyoung to take his wrist and run it under the faucet. There was a serious look on Soonyoung’s face that Jihoon finally had the courage to look at. The blush on his cheeks were from the heat, from the boiling pot of ramyeon, he was sure of it.

Soonyoung turned the faucet off, smiled, and walked to the stove to turn it off too. “The ramyeon’s finished, Ji.”

Jihoon stiffly nodded, not being able to move from his spot. He watched as Soonyoung carefully took the pot holder. At the back of his mind, he knew that he wanted Soonyoung to just sit and relax. He also knew that if he were to scold Soonyoung now, while holding the pot, they might end up back in the hospital.

He _really_ doesn’t want to go back to the hospital.

Soonyoung returned after placing the pot on top of the pot holder in their dining table, rustling for two pairs of chopsticks and two spoons. He held them in one hand, grabbing one of the glasses he left out on the counter. As he walked back to the dining table, he called Jihoon over his shoulder. “Could you get the other glass, and the water, Ji?”

Blinking out of his stupor, Jihoon rushed to open the fridge and taking the cold bottle of water that felt good on his heated skin. His brows scrunched up in realization that Soonyoung might have planned on making him get the cold bottle because of his earlier mishap. He frowned because he wanted to _take care of_ Soonyoung, not _be taken care of by_.

All other thought processing melted away when he saw Soonyoung, leaning onto his elbows on the table with a wide smile on his face. The other pair of chopsticks and spoon were in front of him on an empty seat. Jihoon could _feel_ Soonyoung vibrate in excitement.

As soon as he took his place, Soonyoung grabbed his chopsticks in hand and pressed his hands together. He bowed slightly, voice booming despite being only the two people in the house. “I’ll eat very well!”

Jihoon blushed as Soonyoung began to eat. “Yah, this is normal packed ramyeon.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Soonyoung said, slurping the noodles from the pot they were sharing. Jihoon rolled his eyes after narrowing them in disgust at Soonyoung’s way of eating. Stiffly, he took a bite out of the noodles and slurped loudly as well, ignoring the sinking feeling in his stomach, remembering Soonyoung’s words that sounded similar back in the hospital again.

It didn’t take them more than ten minutes to finish the ramyeon between them, and it wasn’t surprising. Soonyoung pat his stomach, feeling surprisingly full from just that. After counting to ten, because it was too comfortable to just sleep after eating, he stood up.

Seeing him stand, Jihoon flailed, pushing his chair away from the table with a loud screech. Soonyoung froze midway to reaching the pot, brow raised in question. Jihoon didn’t look at him, and reached instead for the pot with the chopsticks and the spoons inside. He grabbed the two glasses and stacked them into one another, and dumped them inside the pot as well. He accidentally hit the bottle of water, and Soonyoung instinctively reached out to grab it, but they both relaxed when they realized that it was thankfully empty.

Once Jihoon placed the pot onto the sink, he released a breathy exhale. His heart was beating too fast, and the blood rushing up his head was too quick. He gripped the edge of the sink so that he could hold onto something to calm him down. Counting backwards, he willed his heartbeat to slow down, until it wasn’t that difficult to breathe.

He reached for the pot, sliding it closer to the faucet but when he reached for the sponge, a hand snapped out to grip his wrist. Jihoon turned, followed the length of the arm despite knowing whose hand it was.

“Ji,” Soonyoung said, and Jihoon wanted to close his eyes at the intensity. “Ji, we need to talk.”

Soonyoung pulled, forcing Jihoon to face him. He cupped Jihoon’s face, carefully raising it to look at him. Jihoon’s eyes were glassy. “Ji,” Soonyoung said, thumbs subconsciously caressing Jihoon’s cheeks. “I’m not forcing you to accept my feelings, you know that, right?”

Jihoon knew. Despite being told that Soonyoung loved him every five goddamn minutes of every goddamn day, Jihoon knew that it wasn’t Soonyoung forcing his feelings onto Jihoon. It was just Soonyoung’s way of expressing it. It was Soonyoung’s way of letting Jihoon know how Soonyoung saw him.

Jihoon nodded, hands reaching to hold onto Soonyoung’s wrists. He closed his eyes, because the intensity was getting too much. But Soonyoung doesn’t tell him to open them. He doesn’t even guide Jihoon’s face back up. Instead, there was a small release of breath, a low chuckle.

“That’s good, then,” Soonyoung continued, releasing Jihoon’s face. He lowered his arms, but Jihoon’s hands still gripped his wrists. Slowly, Jihoon opened his eyes, and this time, he was the one caressing the back of Soonyoung’s palms. It was oddly comforting to be the one doing it instead.

“I just,” Jihoon swallowed the lump in his throat, and it would be the first time he was going to address the _thing_ between them. “I can’t stop seeing you on the hospital bed. I can’t stop seeing you bleeding.”

Jihoon’s eyes fell to Soonyoung’s stomach where the wound was. It was ridiculous. He wasn’t there when Soonyoung was actually stabbed, unlike Junhui. He wasn’t there when Soonyoung was beaten up, unlike the ahjumma. He wasn’t there when Soonyoung had a gun pointed at him, unlike one of their men that helped save ahjumma, her staff, and Soonyoung.

“It doesn’t even matter anymore, Ji,” Soonyoung replied, twisting his hands to hold onto Jihoon’s. “I’m here now, aren’t I?” Soonyoung asked, cutting off Jihoon’s scolding of _yes, it did matter, Kwon_.

Lower than a whisper, lighter than a butterfly’s wing, Jihoon spoke tensely, his hand on top of Soonyoung’s curling into fists instead. “I just can’t stop seeing you almost dying.”

Soonyoung’s eyes widened, his heart beating wildly per minute. Jihoon bit his bottom lip, an effort to stop himself from crying. It was overwhelming. It made him feel too vulnerable, and this was why Jihoon never wanted to admit how precious Soonyoung was to him as well.

Soonyoung pulled them into the living room, sitting on the couch and making themselves comfortable. He made Jihoon sit between his legs, Jihoon’s back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around Jihoon’s neck, tugging him closer and placing his head onto Jihoon’s shoulder. Jihoon held his forearm, and buried his nose and chin behind it. Soonyoung made sure that Jihoon’s ear was close to his heart. Made sure that Jihoon could hear, loud and clear, how fast Soonyoung’s heart was beating now.

“I won’t be that easy to kill, Ji,” Soonyoung said, as he cannot help but smile. They hadn’t been this close since the hospital. He was glad that Jihoon wasn’t pushing him away. “I’ll always, always, be by your side. Whether you like it or not. Telling you that I love you every five goddamn minutes of every goddamn day.”

Jihoon twitched a smile against Soonyoung’s forearm, but he stayed silent. Soonyoung continued, pulling Jihoon even closer that Jihoon could feel Soonyoung’s breath against his skin. “I love you, Ji.”

Soonyoung sighed, content at their position, even if it felt like his back was breaking at the angle he was sitting. Jihoon squirmed, leaning further back against Soonyoung’s chest. He inhaled deeply before he raised his head away from Soonyoung’s. Soonyoung kept his chin against Jihoon’s shoulder, but Jihoon inched his face closer to the slot between Soonyoung’s jaw and his neck.

Jihoon nosed it, inhaling deeply again, smelling and memorizing Soonyoung’s scent. He closed his eyes and smiled. “Soonyoung-ah,” he began, and Soonyoung tensed in expectation. “I love you, too.”

“What.” Soonyoung said, pushing Jihoon away so that they faced each other. Jihoon’s face was pink to the tip of his ears, and down past his collarbones.

“I love you too, you stupid, idiotic-- mmph!”

Soonyoung grabbed Jihoon’s face and pulled it against his, kissing him square on the mouth. It was meant to be a quick kiss, a quick peck on the lips instead of the forehead like Soonyoung usually did. But Jihoon was nothing short of amazing, adapting really fast and opening his lips for Soonyoung.

His brows furrowed in concentration, but his eyes were closed, and his hand grasped Soonyoung’s wrists again, a small semblance of control. But it was Soonyoung who adjusted their faces, who made sure that their teeth didn’t clack against one another, who licked his lips and darted his tongue to meet Jihoon’s because he’s been _fucking waiting for this_.

Jihoon’s exhale was so close to a moan, that Soonyoung had to pull away. “Fucking _shit_.” He whispered against Jihoon’s lips before capturing them again. The glide was easier, slicker from their previous kiss. It was getting harder and harder to breathe, and Soonyoung very nearly decided to just stop breathing altogether.

But Jihoon slapped Soonyoung’s wrists, then his hands, then he held Soonyoung’s head to forcibly pull Soonyoung’s face away from his. They panted, a string of saliva between their lips that would be disgusting normally, but the pink blush on their cheeks and the puffiness of their mouths overwhelmed their senses. Jihoon lowered his hands to wrap it around Soonyoung’s neck as Soonyoung pulled him closer, kissing him again but this time, slower. It was more sensual, and less hurried. Their lips smacked loudly, echoing in the living room as loud as their panting.

“Fuck,” Soonyoung said in-between kisses. “I can’t believe you said it.”

Jihoon smiled, just at the corner of his lips as his head was faced down. His forehead touched against Soonyoung’s. Their chests touched as well, as Jihoon found himself kneeling above Soonyoung’s lap during the kisses. Jihoon wiped the bottom of Soonyoung’s eyes. Soonyoung was crying.

“I can’t believe you actually said it.” The euphoric feeling of hearing Jihoon say that he loved Soonyoung was a whole other emotion. No medicinal drug or feeling of thrill could compare.

Jihoon’s long fingers caressed Soonyoung’s face. Lightly, it touched his forehead, down to his eyelids, to his nose tip, to his cheeks, to his lips, until it settled onto Soonyoung’s neck. Jihoon kissed the trail similarly, light and soft. From his forehead, to his eyelids, to his nose tip, to his cheeks, to his lips, to his jaw, to his neck. Soonyoung raised Jihoon’s face again, for his lips to meet his own. Jihoon didn’t complain.

After what felt like hours of kissing and caressing, they lied down face to face onto the couch almost in the exact same position they were in on the hospital bed. But the atmosphere was different. Jihoon was finally looking at Soonyoung properly, and the feeling on his chest was light. It was happiness.

“I still can’t believe you finally said it.” Soonyoung whispered, his eyes slightly puffy. His lips were swollen and pink from all the kissing, but there was a wide, bright smile that could battle the sun. Soonyoung opened his eyes to look at Jihoon.

With a blush on his cheeks, his pale skin brightening the pinkness of it, Jihoon smiled and said, “It feels so damn good to say it.”

 

* * *

 

They wake up a few hours later, a bit stiff from their position on the couch. The rest weren’t going to be back in a little over an hour, and they decided to watch a movie while they waited. They used the last packs of ramyeon earlier that time so they had no choice but to wait for Junhui and Mingyu to cook. They settled properly, choosing a movie that they both wanted to watch (which wasn’t exactly true. It was something _Jihoon_ wanted to watch, but Soonyoung was whipped).

At first, Jihoon expected them to sit side by side, but Soonyoung wasn’t going to have it. He sat behind Jihoon, pulling him close to sit between his legs as he caged Jihoon’s sides against his thighs. Jihoon allowed himself to be pulled. He waited until Soonyoung was content with his position before squirming and making himself as comfortable as their position allowed.

They were halfway through the action scenes where the car drove quickly, and there were weird explosions all over the place when the lock on the entrance door clicked, and Mingyu entered, whining loudly.

“Ugh,” Mingyu groaned, dragging his six-foot body onto the couch as the rest of them entered. Soonyoung looked up, raising his head from propping his chin on the top of Jihoon’s head. Jihoon kept his hold on Soonyoung’s bicep, not letting him move too far away from him. Mingyu fell faced down and continued to whine.

Jihoon paused the movie. Mingyu rarely acted like a brat, but something must have happened. Jeonghan and Junhui sat on the other chair, and the floor while Seungcheol took the chair from their dining table to sit beside Jeonghan. Mingyu kicked his legs in a childish tantrum, moaned loudly in a whine, and slammed his fists onto the thick couch.

“Dare I ask?” Jihoon said, eyes darting from Seungcheol to Jeonghan to Junhui to Mingyu. Junhui made himself comfortable on the ground, leaning back and spreading his limbs in the floor. Soonyoung propped his chin back on the top of Jihoon’s head, before squishing his cheek on it.

“The librarian scolded Mingyu today,” Jeonghan said, waving a hand at Mingyu’s general direction, but smirked after. Thinking about the situation, it was a funny sight.

“He made too much of a commotion in a _library_.” Seungcheol continued for Jeonghan, loosening his tie and shrugging off his blazer.

Mingyu pushed his upper body up by his arms and pouted at them all. “I was _checking_ for anything suspicious!”

“You were _yelling_ as soon as you opened the door,” Junhui said, not moving an inch. “It was a _library_ , Gyu-ah.”

“Stupid librarian in the stupid library. I was checking to see if it was _safe_ and he hits a book’s spine on top of my head then _kicks me out_ for being too noisy.” Mingyu mumbled as he sat straight, curling into himself a bit and pouting like a child. Soonyoung and Jihoon watched, their eyes moving back and forth from the person speaking to the next like a tennis game. Soonyoung held a small, amused smile. Neither of them comment on the darkening blush on Mingyu’s cheeks.

“And the family meeting?” Soonyoung asked.

Seungcheol and Junhui groaned louder. “The big boss scolded all of us.”

“Patrols need to be tightened, and interacting with the shop and restaurant owners are a must.” Junhui said, finally raising his head from the seat of the chair where Jeonghan was sprawled over its arm-rest.

“We have to become stricter with the lower sections of the family, too.” Seungcheol said, the atmosphere suddenly tense. Jihoon squeezed his grip on Soonyoung’s bicep. Soonyoung raised his head to look down at Jihoon, but Jihoon’s face didn’t betray any special emotion. The marks around his arms were going to be there, though. Bright and pink. He felt Jihoon shaking. The possibility of what happened to Soonyoung happening again scared him. Soonyoung smiled, wrapping his arms around Jihoon’s neck, and pulling him even closer. Close enough that Jihoon was practically lying on top of Soonyoung’s chest.

Junhui raised an eyebrow. “Well, you two are closer than normal.”

Jihoon’s hand slowly moved to take Soonyoung’s, and he slotted their fingers together. A perfect fit. Soonyoung placed his head onto Jihoon’s shoulder this time. Jihoon’s face still didn’t give away emotion, but there was a soft, pink blush rising up his cheeks that reached down his neck. It was endearing, seeing it so up close. Soonyoung squeezed his hand, and his smile was wider. He moved quickly, kissing Jihoon’s cheek with a light peck.

Jihoon pulled away, eyes wide in shock, and one of his hands holding his cheek where Soonyoung kissed him. The rest of them had their jaws down on the ground but Soonyoung smiled, brighter than any blush, or any ray of the sun. He was sure to get a beating (out of embarrassment) later, but he found that he didn’t give a damn.

“All the better.”

**Author's Note:**

>  **2017.04.14:** And that concludes _from the bottom of my heart_ , the soonhoon prequel! this was a bit of a rollercoaster ride to write, if i can be honest with you, and i'm sorry it took so long and i ended up with the final chapter instead. truth be told, i still had 2 chapters in my thought dump (where i plan all my stuff) but when i continued writing the chapter, i found that it would have been too short if i kept it at just the hospital scene (that was supposedly chapter 6. chapter 7 was them at home). so i continued writing and et voila! final chapter for the soonhoon prequel.
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> i know i stopped replying to comments, and i'm so so so _so_ sorry for that, but i read them all, and they all make my day. i come back to it whenever i feel depressed and unmotivated, so THANK YOU!! this fic reached over 100 kudos and i'm surprised and happy and very touched like, _you guys_! so from here, i hope you can continue reading my other fics after this! see you! 8U8
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> i apologize for any and all mistakes which includes meditation practice, and fighting skills. m(__)m
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> PS. i write commentary while writing all the titles from _like a beast_. is anyone interested to see my thoughts in writing these? like, why did i choose that person and wrote them the way they were written? what was my absolutely favorite piece to write? seriously, it's commentary. basically my thoughts as to why i wrote the way i did. hahaha and if you were interested, would you like to read it after each title is finished, or after the entire series (like a beast) is finished? :D
> 
> The SoonHoon prequel, you guys! It's pretty stand-alone, since it happens way before the Meanie. You don't even have to read the Meanie before or after reading this (unless you want to see them again, being all sweet and all). But anyway, all kudos and comments give me life. ;u; thank you!
> 
> Most of my knowledge of the people are from a few performances, interviews and a whole fuck-ton of fanfiction. ~~which may or may not be a good basis for characterization...~~ So if there are any out of characterizations, please feel free to inform me. Also, any kind of criticisms are greatly appreciated.
> 
> This was edited and re-edited by me. It's not English-picked, so please forgive grammatical errors and extreme wrong use of tenses.
> 
> TALK TO ME: [tumblr](http://haengbokhaeya.tumblr.com) | [twitter (personal)](http://twitter.com/shinybicho) | [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/shinybicho)


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